Budget Day in Scotland – some unusual solutions being proposed.
Ahead of today’s budget, MSP’s on the Finance Committee were advised by ‘experts’ speaking to them in Holyrood: I thought I should take a look at who these experts were.
Colin Mair, chief executive of the private company limited by guarantee known as “Improvement Services” was easy enough to find. He has spent 25 years steeped in the lore of local government. Learning the language of those who reduce human beings and their lives to impenetrable management speak. How glibly the phrases roll off the tongue after 25 years, rewarded by a directorship of a company entirely funded by millions of pounds of tax payers money, set up to advise local governments how to spend tax payers money.
What advice is the Scottish parliament being given on ‘best practice’ in spending tax payers money? They are being warned that there is likely to be ‘inter-generational conflict’ ahead. That the younger generation will seriously resent those ‘with generous pensions’ (Yes, Mr Mair is the one and only person in his company with a Defined Benefit Pension, paid for by the tax payer, I did check the accounts).
Apparently, having to pay student fees, eventually, slowly, out of future earnings, means that pressure will be brought on future local governments to stop giving pensioners free bus travel or caring for them in their old age. Caring for them? In his next breath, Mr Mair proposes a solution.
Health professionals might have to consider “how protracted we wish to make people’s deaths”.
Protracted death? What a wonderful phrase. Our entire lives are protracted death. Mr Mair thinks that the final solution is the final solution. Bring death forward. Best practice advice for the local council! Best take it – you paid for it.
It is of course the perfect solution. As soon as the older generation become economically inactive, bump ‘em off and the young can inherit their house. Spreadsheet savings across all 32 local government offices.
It is gaining currency this notion that the younger generation are having it harder than previous generations. They forget that the generation which brought them up inherited the economic chaos after World War 11. Did we advocate bumping off the older generation, e’en as we started work paying the new national insurance tax to give them a pension?
At the risk of sounding like Victor Meldrew – ‘Cardboard box were it? You wuz lucky’ – do you ever wonder what the elderly sitting on their park benches are thinking as they watch the younger generation? Do you think they hark back to the days when they woke up with ice on the inside of the window and it was no use yelling from the shower “Mum the hot waters finished”. Do you think they remember the outside toilets; the long trek to the phone box and the wait in the cold until someone else had finished their weekly conversation with a husband working down south? Do you think they remember the weekly tussle with the mangle and the boiler, or even the proverbial orange boxes they started married life with?
Do you think they ever look at the younger generation with their cars and mobile phones and iPods and 100 quid trainers, and think, blimey you’ve got a soft life. Yes, the older generation had free education, but they paid dearly in lots of other ways for the soft life that the young enjoy now.
‘Compressed morbidity’ used to be a phrase that struck a chill in me – but that at least means keeping us healthy for as long as possible. A ‘less protracted death’ really does frighten me to death, as we listen to Ian Duncan-smith telling Scotland that an independent Scotland couldn’t afford the level of benefits it awards itself now, and the ‘experts’ are advising MSP’s as to ‘best practice’ on how to solve the problem…
I’m glad I’m not a Scottish pensioner.
September 22, 2012 at 12:03
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The comparison with wartime poverty is valid, though there are some who
would take those days if it meant they could smoke in pubs,the Boy Scout
movement had not been nearly regulated out of existence, children got taught
to read rather than about catastrophhic global warming etc.
However the point I noted was how far back you had to go to find an era
when we were unambiguously much poorer We have to go back nearly 40 years to
find a period when we were only half as well off. The Chinese, with 10%
growth, have to go back only 7 years.
If Swinney’s claim that this budget was a “relentles” pursuit of growth,
.& Salmonds that his cabinet were spending “every hour” seeking growth
were not the lies of individuals and a party which is wholly. completely and
totally corrupt, every MSP of whom lackes the tiniest trace of personal
honesty, we could have a growth rate at least close to that of China.
- September 21, 2012 at 16:40
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I remember the winter of 62/3 well. A snowman survived so long it ended up
with an old-age pension, it probably signed on the dole and still appears on
the voter list too, in the heavily liebour constituency where I lived.
- September 21, 2012 at 14:16
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Well, we had ice on the inside of the windows a couple of winters ago (Jan
2010). Admittedly, that’s because we still have and use the Victorian shutters
on many of our windows and a couple of single-glazed windows (and some old
aluminium double glazed units where the frames get more than a little chilly.)
Toasty inside the shut shutters, however.
- September 21, 2012 at 06:33
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\\Health professionals might have to consider “how protracted we wish to
make people’s deaths”.\\
Not necessarily a new problem – see “On the Gate –
A tale of ’16″ – from ‘Debits and Credits’ by Rudyard Kipling –
[Scene –
“The Pearly Gates” during WW1 – St Peter and The Angel of Death are discussing
how the number of casualties from trench warfare is upsetting the ‘civil
servants’ that administer the afterlife – and follow RULES…]
\\
IF the
Order Above be but the reflection of the Order Below … it is not outside the
Order of Things that there should have been confusion also in the Department
of Death. The world’s steadily falling death-rate, the rising proportion of
scientifically prolonged fatal illnesses, which allowed months of warning to
all concerned, had weakened initiative throughout the Necrological
Departments. When the War came, these were as unprepared as civilised mankind;
and, like mankind, they improvised and recriminated in the face of
Heaven.
\\
http://www.telelib.com/authors/K/KiplingRudyard/prose/DebtsandCredits/gate.html
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September 21, 2012 at 05:14
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Anna
I always kind of liked this story be it true or not..
A self-important college freshmen walking along the beach took it upon
himself to explain to a senior citizen resting on the steps why it was
impossible for the older generation to understand his generation.
”You grew
up in a different world, actually an almost primitive one”, the student said
loud enough for others to hear.
The young people of today grew up with
television, jet planes, space travel, man walking on the moon. We have nuclear
energy, ships and cell phones, computers with light speed and so much
more.”
After a brief silence, the senior citizen responded as
follows:
“You’re right son. We didn’t have those things when we were young,
so we invented them. Now, you arrogant child what are you doing for the next
generation?”
Another point Anna, as Diana West postulates what happens when the grown
ups die?
Moley
- September 21, 2012 at 02:21
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There is one thought that the aged should ponder when faced by such people
“you can always take one with you” – Learned during WW2.
- September 20, 2012 at 23:00
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I remember 62/63, thought it would never end. I shared a bedsit in London
then and the snow came in the windows. Never having any money we lived on
chips and milk and despite the weather we still went out in short skirts and
high heels, must have been mad! but we survived. From what I read about some
hospitals they are already helping old people on their way and I intend to
stay out of them if at all possible.
- September 20, 2012 at 21:03
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Comments above have triggered memories of the winter of 62/63 – our
family’s outside toilet held such attraction that we positively wished for
chronic constipation. Ever tried using a single sheet of Bronco, frozen solid
for the past 3 months ?
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September 20, 2012 at 19:00
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If you want a really scary euphemism….How about “Uneconomic To Repair?”
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September 20, 2012 at 19:26
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I think I’m Uneconomic to repair
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September 21, 2012 at 12:07
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If I were a horse they would have shot me and made me into glue years
ago…!
- September 20, 2012 at 17:08
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My maternal grandparents didn’t get electricity until 1962. Washing day
Monday took up most of the day with heating the copper, pounding the dolly tub
and cranking the mangle. Then it was hung out on the ‘front’ green between two
vertical railway sleepers as part of a five shilling per year pitch rented
from BR. Electricity allowed them to buy one of Mr. Roll’s twin-tubs.
Our
bedroom was ‘carpeted’ with a dyed rug from the paternal grandparents house
with bits of lino stuck around the edge to fill the one foot margin. When I
got my first house it carpeted the living room. Everyone’s stairs were stained
on the outer six inches of the treads and risers to fill the gap left by the
cloth ‘runner’ down the centre, held down with stair rods. My grandmother
would pull hers out weekly and polish them.
Milk and eggs that wet ‘off’,
unwrapped bread loaves left on doorsteps that we gnawed the corners off when
we couldn’t get in the house. Six-year olds walking to and from school on
their own, buses that you could jump off before the stop! Happy days!
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September 20, 2012 at 19:25
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I just think we were less spoilt and much tougher in those days. I havent
got the figures but I bet the child/ young person suicide rates would be
lower per capita than todays
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September 20, 2012 at 15:52
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I can remember the early 60s living on the South coast, and the harsh
winter of 1963— times were tough then.
We had no money, dad didnt have a
car.
All our jeans were patched when the wore through, and shoes cheap
Woolworth Baseball boots . No credit cards, No loans— you only spent what you
had , and if you didnt have it you went with out. I can remember my brother
and I were allowed 1 bar of an electric fire on to get dressed by on the
winter’s mornings, and the net curtains did come unfrozed from the windows
till early afternoon. I remember mum getting her first washing machine, and
wow our first fridge! then the thrill of black and white TV— two channels BBC
and ITV. As the family became more affluent Mum managed to afford a 50cc Honda
moped to go to work on. I started work in a shop part time at 12, and later
whilst going through school and college, served petrol, work on fairgrounds,
worked in cable factory all before I was 19
We were frightened of the
police and at school you use to get the Cane or a real slapping if you
misbehaved. 3 or 4 strokes of the bamboo really used to hurt
Your right
time have changed!— I’m not sure for the good
- September 20, 2012 at 17:07
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Ah yes, no mains electricity till the age of 12 and just dare to break a
gas mantle while playing, and all the other stuff like having to clean out
the grate and light a fire. Progress is good, let the sandals and corduroys
greenies step back in time if they wish.
But back to Scotland; soylent
green haggis perhaps?
- September 20, 2012 at 19:12
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‘soylent green haggis’… Inspired!!
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September 21, 2012 at 06:06
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Not exactly ‘Soylent Green’ – but there IS a Company in Scotland that
makes vegetarian Kosher haggis.
http://www.thejc.com/community/community-life/43985/kosher-haggis-supplier-burns-enthusiasm
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September 20, 2012 at 19:22
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Other things were good— sitting in front of the coal fire. Xmas and
Bonfire night were the hilights of the year. Dad taking us fishing for
tench in a lovely lake covered in lily pads was great. Going out with my
brother on his Triumph motorcycle was exciting. I remember we had a
holiday to North Wales and we were riding around the base roads to mount
snowdon and it was great— it was 1970— on a motorbike two up in the
mountains of wales!
Xmas was special.
Going beach fishing for
codling on a winters night. The fresh codling were so lovely the next
day
I still ride a Triumph Motorcycle
Rock on Britain
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September 22, 2012 at 01:16
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“… I still ride a Triumph Motorcycle”. Does it break down often?? If
it doesn’t, it isn’t a real Triumph… in my unfortunate experience!!
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September 20, 2012 at 13:39
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I remember the outside toilet in my grannies house where we lived for a
time. I was terrified of falling down there! And ice on the windows when I was
a student!
Meanwhile….This bloke sounds like the perfect modern
“politico-leech” (saingusuna politicus), a newly discovered species. It is
perfectly adapted to the getting and spending of public money, with no
discernable by product or benefit at all. Its exact role and purpose in nature
remains unclear. Some believe that the species is native to Scotland, but have
been introduced to the rest of the UK by local authorities who believed them
to be pets. Whatever the truth, they are now breeding out of control.
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September 20, 2012 at 13:41
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Pardon the grammer. Multi tasking!
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September 20, 2012 at 14:23
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I too remember the outside loo at my Grannies which had 2 holes in a
wooden bench and the lorry came round to pump out the contents once a month.
Using that in summer was an experience I would not wish on many; however,
there is a man with a black glass eye who I hope has to use something
similar for the rest of his days.
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September 20, 2012 at 14:47
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Ha!
- September 20, 2012 at 13:35
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Here in the lovely Dark Ages Kingdom of Northumbria, there’s a move afoot
to reduce the number of politicos from an unexpected quarter, and it could
substantially reduce the Kingdom’s deficit..
http://caedmonscat.blogspot.co.uk/2012/09/badgered.html
- September 20, 2012 at 13:27
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Why on earth do they spend taxpayers’ money on ‘experts’?
The taxpayers (us) pay the MPs, MSPs (and AMs if you’re in Wales) and a lot
of very highly qualified and therefore (presumably) intelligent civil servants
to work out how much they can reasonably raise in taxes, and how to spend it
for the common good. Some fairly simple arithmetic (applied to the results of
a lot of information gathering) should reveal whether or not tax receipts
match spending aspirations, and thus by how much those aspirations have to be
tempered. Yet we apparently need even more expensive experts to work out how
to do some simple sums?
No wonder we’re in a mess. For Gawd’s sake – KEEP IT SIMPLE!
- September 20, 2012 at 14:52
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“Some fairly simple arithmetic …….. should reveal whether or not tax
receipts match spending aspirations, and thus by how much those aspirations
have to be tempered.” Absolutely rational and 100% how government should
be run.
But come on Engineer, you are much too intelligent to make that
statement, the whole government Ponzi infrastructure would collapse were
such common-sense advice followed, besides it would mean making tough
choices and government simply does not do that, it makes them look too
“nasty”.
Even in those rose-tinted times of yore when we awoke to frost on the
inside of our windows the governments were never balancing the books, and
the health outcomes were not so great for the OAP’s either.
Hate to say it, but the likes of Colin Mair and John Prescott with their
multiple streams of income and index-linked, gold-plated pensions are the
rational players in this game and the taxpayers will get whatever shitty
health system they decide we deserve. Now quit thinking they have
high-priced consultants who do that for you.
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September 20, 2012 at 19:30
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*sigh*
You’re right, of course. It’s difficult to justify a six-figure salary
by making something simple. Far more to be earned by making it seem
complex. (Not just in government, either…)
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September 21, 2012 at 08:35
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Here is how it’s done Engineer, first you setup a project to
determine how spending affects outcomes ( in management speak) :
note it will report back in June 2011, lets look at June 2011
http://www.improvementservice.org.uk/news-2011/june-2011/
Errrmmm, nothing, that’s embarrassing, try July, whoops not yet.
August? apparently not. September? nope but if you sign-up for their
masterclass you can learn lots of gee-whiz stuff. October, nope.
November, bingo. Only five months late on a five month project, good
enough for government work. Go read the recommendations-hilarious.
They of course recommended another bigger study, amongst all the
bafflegab and self-congratulation.
Thars money in them, there management consulting hills, no
professional risk and a relaxed attitude to reporting on time. Any
wonder why government is so expensive, this little boondoggle is
probably replicated hundreds of times across government.
- September 21, 2012 at
09:51
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September 21, 2012 at 16:34
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Reply to the landlady @ 09 :51, because linux seems to lose the
reply function after a thread of about four replies. Which is one way
of shutting me up, so all-in-all a feature not a bug.
No, I did not see that, I rather suspect the cozy little management
shop will hire a consultant to report on the necessity for all
publically-funded entities to report on the triple bottom line because
we all know that focusing on the money can lead to incorrect results
in government.
Besides there is always more money, so whats the rush with
reporting, starve a few grannies if necessary.
- September 22, 2012 at 23:23
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Not a chance.
That would dispossess the vast majority of otherwise-useless &
pointless camp followers of their raison d’être…
Pigs will never advocate their removal from the trough!
- September 20, 2012 at 13:24
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Ice on the inside of the window is something I remember and I am some way
off pensioner age! Nae central heating, mangles until my parents got a twin
tub on installments (cue terrible warnings about not putting our fingers
anywhere near the spinner), rented colour TV’s and paraffin heaters….. and
then the glorious student years when I wore more clothes going to bed than
going to the shops. I have traumatice amnesia over some of my more, er,
*interesting* fashion choices.
On a more serious note I am glad my parents
were in Scotland when they became less able to look after themselves and
needed some home help. It kept them independent and out of the care system and
happier as a result. Not sure Mr Mair’s position is quite what Margo McDonald
had in mind when she put forward a bill for assisted suicide and I know who my
money is on if she finds out about it!
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September 20, 2012 at 12:57
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Orange Crates? That were luxury to us!
http://www.davidpbrown.co.uk/jokes/monty-python-four-yorkshiremen.html
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September 20, 2012 at 15:40
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Classic Phyton
{ 34 comments }