60 things you say to children
60 things a parent has told their child:
– What do you mean you’re still hungry
– Don’t touch that, it’s hot
– Go to bed, I’m tired
– Don’t step in that
– Did you step in that
– I told you it was hot
– Leave your brother alone
– Ew, go wipe that off
– Get that out of your mouth
– Stop it
– Okay what happened
– Does that belong on the floor, I don’t think so
– Put that down
– Could you just stop talking and eat your dinner
– Get over here
– Get over there
– How did the macaroni get in your nose
– Don’t wipe that on me
– Where did all this water come from
– Stop it, that’s disgusting
– What is that on your clothes
– How would you like it if I did that to you
– Is that television still on in there
– Okay go get the Band-aids
– Let’s play the quiet game
– What do you have in your mouth
– Is something burning
– Why are my shoes in the bathtub
– No, dogs don’t like trampolines
– Get back in this house right now
– Are you trying to kill yourself or what
– That’s not funny
– Go wash that off
– Wait, you’re going to jump off of what
– Don’t come crying to me, you started it
– Yes I heard you the first time
– Don’t do that at the table
– Pick that up and put it back where it belongs
– What is that on your face
– Did you hear what I just said
– Don’t put things in your nose
– Put that back we’re about to eat dinner
– What did I just tell you
– What. Did. I. Just. Tell. You.
– Don’t throw that in the house
– Where are your pants
– Stop that you’re getting food everywhere
– Get away from the street
– Close the door
– It’s okay you’re not bleeding anywhere
– Alright who did this
– It’s green beans, you like green beans, they’re good
– What did you say to me
– Let go of that, he was playing with it first
– Get back in bed
– What is that smell
– But you ate the green beans before
– No we’re not having cake for dinner
– What is that in your hair
– If I have to come back up those stairs again
Original comment on Coding Horror.
Worth reading the article “On Parenthood” as Jeff Atwood describes the feelings and emotions of being a parent.
SBML
Photo by Juanmonino
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1
October 26, 2011 at 03:38 -
My wife says all those things to me all the time too. Spooky. I never realised I was marrying my mother. Or possibly hers as well.
(Horrified shudder)
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2
October 26, 2011 at 06:02 -
That’s if you are a good and caring parent.
Otherwise, you don’t bother to say more than half of those things – and the utterances one does make usually contain the words, ‘fucking’, ‘bastard’ and ‘cunt’ with the second preceded with the adjective ‘little’.
I am not joking.
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3
October 26, 2011 at 06:47 -
61 – “George – don’t do that.”
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4
October 26, 2011 at 07:25 -
Unexpected things heard from the mouth of a child:
“I want to do algebra Right Now!”
As for the list, we’re exempt from any of the stair-related ones, living entirely at ground level. I also occasionally worry that I’m beginning to sound like my father.
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5
October 26, 2011 at 09:28 -
Thinking back nearly 50 years I remember using something like a few on the list, but for us it was much more about setting the boundaries that all children must have if they are not to become like wild animals.
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6
October 26, 2011 at 14:25 -
Scram/Skidaddle/Go away!
That’s what our kiddies have been told:
http://caedmonscat.blogspot.com/2011/10/dismissing-masses.html -
7
October 26, 2011 at 18:31 -
“You don’t get any dessert, until you’ve eaten all your main course”
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8
October 27, 2011 at 00:10 -
“come down from the chimney it is time for you to clock on at the coal mine”.
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9
October 27, 2011 at 09:35 -
10
October 27, 2011 at 10:46 -
“It can wait until I’m out of the bath.”
“Keep singing, we’re nearly home, don’t fall asleep, DON’T FALL ASLEEP!”
“It can wait until I’m dressed.”
“Hold on while I fetch the step ladder. Hold on!”
“Why didn’t you tell me earlier?” -
11
October 27, 2011 at 13:14 -
“If you don’t stop crying I will give you something to cry about”
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12
October 27, 2011 at 13:57 -
Put that down!
Do you want a smack?
What did you say?
You did what?!!!!!!!1
Who dressed the dog up?
Stop whining!
No!!!!!!
Funny how the words of paise tend to be so heavily outweighed
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13
October 28, 2011 at 12:47 -
Great list……… my own wee additions:
‘It’s nice to share’
‘We don’t put raisins up our nose’
‘How do you ask for something nicely?’
‘I want doesn’t get’
‘Mummy’s ALWAYS come back to get you’
‘You can always have a hug’ -
14
October 28, 2011 at 14:07 -
“You’ll put somebody’s eye out with that!”
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