The Bearded Lady. – The Anna Raccoon Archives

by Anna Raccoon on June 13, 2011

There is nothing the Western world of bleeding heart liberals likes more than tales of oppressed women and oppressed homosexuals. Oppressed women who are also homosexual, and have been seized by armed men, and hustled into large American cars purporting to be owned by supporters of hated regimes in the Middle East are just the icing on the cake…

The Guardian nearly wet itself when news of ‘frank and witty lesbian blogger’ Amina Abdallah Arraf’s alleged kidnapping was relayed to it by her cousin.

“We do not know who took her, so we do not know who to ask to get her back. It is possible that they are forcibly deporting her. From other family members who have been imprisoned there, we believe that she is likely to be released fairly soon. If they wanted to kill her, they would have done so. That is what we are all praying for,” she wrote.

Nooo! – Subterranean jails crawling with cockroaches, helpless lesbians at the mercy of misogynistic guards, leering at her with gap-toothed foul-breathed priapismic charm, (can we manage a belch or two from his overhanging gut, just for good effect?)

The US State Department started an investigation, Ms Abdallah was said to be half American. Perhaps a daring raid by the US Seals to snatch her from the jaws of these dastardly foreigners – followed by a press conference with Hilary Clinton and Hamu Abedin to explain how each and every half blood lesbian blogger was important to the liberal west, even if they were only half American. It’s the American half that counts, right?

Her girlfriend in Canada, Sandra Bagaria, who had been conducting an on-line courtship with her for months, (no doubt looking forward to the consummation), said:

“I have no news. I am working as hard as I can; we all are, to gather as much information as I can gather. I talked to Rania yesterday at the end of the day, but she had no news. None of us have any news. What we are doing now is alerting as many people as possible in Syria to get as much information as we can. The blog is very popular and since yesterday word has spread on Twitter, and now people are spreading the news very quickly.”

Ms. Bagaria added that Ms. Arraf had been hiding in “four or five different apartments in four or five different cities” across Syria since two young men appeared at her home in Damascus several weeks ago.

The T-shirts were printed – Free the Amina One! – the Facebook group primed with thousands of members flooded Twitter with calls to free Amina – ‘borders mean nothing when you have wings’…was Amina an angel too? What luck, not only did they have the support of the entire LGBT community, but all those who believe in angels…

Lo! The new Nelson Mandella was amongst us. No doubt somewhere in deepest Peckham there were calls for the latest Tower Block to be renamed Abdallah Towers.

The Guardian hiccupped slightly when several readers, obviously not truly of the ‘faith’ were unkind enough to point out that the photograph they had printed of Amina in fact belonged to Jelena Lecic, who was neither gay, a blogger, nor kidnapped. Pesky little details.

Last night as the campaign swept the western world, Amina was revealed to be the bearded gentleman on the right of my photograph, an Edinburgh University student. Tom MacMaster, who has campaigned for years against the government in Syria – but dammit, he just wasn’t managing to hook those essential bleeding hearts – so he invented Amina…and the lesbian angle, and the blog, and the kidnapping.

Next time a repressive government is accused of endangering the life of either a blogger or a homosexual, or both – that government will be able to point the finger at this incident and say it is a hoax, it never happened.

That is some own goal Mr MacMaster.

Coming soon: Old Holborn is unmasked as Dolly the Sheep’s left tit. Charon QC reveals he is a 17 year old lap dancer in Estonia. Guido confesses he is a full time Union Official. Obnoxio turns out to be Polly Toynbee’s trans-gendered dwarf butler.

{ 26 comments }

Stranglehold Gertie June 14, 2011 at 19:15

I am affronted to find my erstwhile wrestling career being discussed on a
thread titled The Bearded Lady. I’ll have you know that I am vigilant with the
Immac and, at dusk, believe-you-me my stretch-lycra spangled bodystocking
leaves no doubt that I am all-woman. All fat woman, admittedly, but all-woman
nonetheless.

kitler June 14, 2011 at 14:58

I think fake lezza man sould be tied to a chair left alone in a room with
Peter Tatchel for an hour. I’m pretty sure that a man who has attempted to
arrest Mugabe and regularly goes to brutal East European countries to stick up
for real persecuted gays would have a few choice words for this horrible,
counter productive charlatain.

Gallovidian June 14, 2011 at 11:28

Do you remember an old television game show where you had to decide which
person was making up their life story. It was always easy because the fake
life stories were made up by people who lived in the stinking depraved
enclosed little world of the media establishment, they just weren’t real to
real people.

Well done McMaster for holding the MSM up to ridicule. Your pish and lies
were well up there with the cliched disinformation efforts of a major Western
intelligence agency.

Caedmon’s Cat June 14, 2011 at 09:02

For the record, let it be known that this Cat is not some anonymous lefty
shill in drag – but I did leave a personalised colorectal message in Laurie
Penny’s jockstrap…

2Mac June 13, 2011 at 19:46

Looking at the picture he is not exactly a stereotype is he:

Student, Bearded, Che T Shirt, Politically Correct, Marxist, Wanker

Is there something wrong with out Education System that it can only produce
Communist Revolutionaries 4 decades after the communists have moved on.

Cascadian June 13, 2011 at 19:15

C’mon guys, what’s a chubby 40-year old, medieval studies professional
student, che tee-shirt wearing guy to do?

He can’t get a date, dudgeons and dragons has lost it’s shine, the next
Harry Potter book is years away, he’s studying at a pretend university where
dim royals and their hangers-on go to get art appreciation degrees. He needs
some action, what better way than to pretend he is a mouthy lesbian shouting
“truth to power” while being chased by some mean men “in large american cars”.
Besides, he obviously understands how to get the attention of the likes of
camoron and hildebeest.

I say well done Tom McMaster for revealing what is going on in your
universities, and identifying an area where minimum 66% budget cuts can be
made. He has provided a valuable service.

Like your comments 2Mac.

2Mac June 13, 2011 at 19:51

Why thank you Sir, I also laughed at your comment. The only thing missing
from this muppet militant is a position in the National Union of Students
and a PLO scarf.

Another thing. How can the fictional character have a “cousin”? How many
people are involved in this story?

Clarissa June 13, 2011 at 20:16

I would hazard that MacMaster was playing all the parts in this
three-ring farce.

Cascadian June 14, 2011 at 04:49

This story just got more weird, another “guy” posing as a lesbian.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/blogpost/post/paula-brooks-editor-of-lez-get-real-also-a-man/2011/06/13/AGld2ZTH_blog.html

Next thing, they are gonna tell me the good-looking chicks in the
lesbian porno movies are not for real.

Anna Raccoon June 14, 2011 at 06:49

Oh God, and I thought my cage fighting days were behind me – I can
feel it, I’m going to be unmasked soon…and you all believed that I was
young, lithe, beautiful!

On another note – this is going to knock a hole in the pink lobby –
every time they claim that 10% or whatever they say it is of the
population are gay, people are going to point to these episodes and say
‘gerrorf’, 99% of those are bearded web site owners having a laugh’.

Cascadian June 14, 2011 at 18:35: So my enthusiasm to see Stranglehold Gertie (aka Gloria Smudd) on
the card in Vancouver is to be denied.

Such is life, I will have to console myself with thoughts of a
young, lithe, beautiful Gloria Stitz

I do hope that the unversities these people attend are charging
tuition for the multiple persona (sp?) that seem to be attending.

Dick Puddlecote June 13, 2011 at 16:58

This is the great thing about lefties. For all their misguided self-casting
as being higher, more intelligent, beings than the rest of us, they just can’t
help parodying themselves in the most dull-witted ways.

permanentexpat June 13, 2011 at 16:22

I’m an old fart who doesn’t believe all progress is wonderful
Clearly
Twitter & Facebook are swords with very different edges, for as much as
you can get the truth quickly rolling & disseminated, the same applies to
mis/disinformation & downright lies…and all can be easily
manipulated.
I , unsurprisingly, use neither of these programs &
sometimes question the sanity of those who do…and then complain about the
growing lack of privacy…Duh!
The story is, nevertheless, high-larious.

2Mac June 13, 2011 at 16:17

False Flag excersises by the PC Left are all over the internet. Rather than
deal with the reality that is cruel enough, they invent stories, tragedies and
lies that distort the truth and prove their narative. They demand action and
then when action is taken they cry oppression and protest about the loss of
life cuased by the very action they demanded.

Lefties have that amazing ability to take no responsibility for the
process. They just want results, delivered perfectly with no one getting hurt
or killed. They seems to live in a very different world to reality.

If you think the fake blogging about Syria is bad, imagine how much of the
Palestine Oppression lies are spread by Hamas and their well meaning
assistants in Universities around the West.

The MacMaster baiter of political correctness will have no doubt fiddled so
much attention over the last few months, causing the Syrian regime to try and
identify who this famous blogger is. I wonder how many real Syrian bloggers
had the electrodes placed inside their cavities while the regime saught
answers. I wonder how many times you are electrocuted before they believe
you?

Your point about this blogger having a negative impact is all too real. The
regime will run this story as proof that the US/UK/West are behind the
uprising and all the trouble, that all the trouble is caused by
infidels/CIA/Israel trying to generate reasons to invade another muslim
country.

It will allow all those who wish to turn a blind eye to the trouble in
Syria/Iran/Libya/Bahrain/Yemen/Tunisia/Pakistan/ Saudi/Random Muslim Country
an element of comfort that all may not be what it seems and that many of the
reports are false. Reconfirm them the west are trying to cause conflict in the
middle east.

In the mean time the Revolutionary Guard of Iran who entered Syrian on mass
a few weeks ago will continue to cleanse(Shoot in the head) Syrian society of
any/all voices of rebellion.

The troops that have been shot so far have all been executed, shot in the
head at point blank range. Reports from deserting soldiers is that their is an
additional “Unknown” regime force in charge on the ground. They arrive when
the trouble flares, order shootings, shoot soldiers who do not shoot
civilians, then claim all of this is the work of Terrorists.

Interestingly if you listen to the web chat of both sides, both are
convinced as ever that the Israeli’s are behind the trouble. The Government
are a pawn of Israel or the Rebels are a pawn of Israel. Much of the graffiti
shows Assad with the Star of David. Similar situations in Libya and other
middle eastern countries. As every good Arab and left knows all death in the
middle east is the fault of Israel/Zionists or the Arrogant State USA. Who
knows where it will end. How many people must die before Arabs learn the art
of discussion.

In the mean time while all this goes on and keeps everyone destracted. The
Iranians are very near to completing Weapons grade nuclear technology and the
missle system to launch it. Thank Allah, they do not wish to see the world
ended in order to herald the rise of the hidden Iman…Oh shit they do…2012 it
is not the Mayan calander that concerns me it the Iranian schedule.

Another Pointless Degree Scrounger June 13, 2011 at 14:10

“…If they wanted to kill her, they would have done so. That is what we are
all praying for,”

Bless. The way people phrase their utterances these days!

Livewire June 13, 2011 at 13:11

A bearded Scot hates Assad
So he did something awfully bad
Put on
some fake tits
And got lots of hits
Till supporters sussed out they’d
been had

Daz Pearce June 13, 2011 at 12:50

There’s a serious point about some of this stuff and how they tug at the
heartstrings to press the case for invading a country. Iraq had its ‘weapons’,
the Libyan government is engaging in ‘mass rape’ and now this Syrian hoax.

The PC lobby will of course come to the student’s defence and suggest that
the ends justified the means – isn’t that what they always say when they are
caught out?

http://outspokenrabbit.blogspot.com/

Demetrius June 13, 2011 at 12:45

So, Lord Lucan you have been found at last………..

Engineer June 13, 2011 at 12:19

OK, I admit it! I haven’t really got a clue about chemical plant design,
have never heard of ANSI B31-3, don’t know the difference between Whitworth
and Unified screwthreads, and couldn’t operate a centre-lathe to save my life.
I’m really a leggy brunette with a Cindy Crawford figure seeking a release
from my shallow existence of endless A-list parties, highly-paid modelling
assignments and posing for Playboy centrefolds!

P.S. – I’ll bet Gloria Smudd is really Elle MacPherson’s alter ego!

Livewire June 13, 2011 at 13:45

I have it on good authority she’s actually ‘Stranglehold Gertie’, the
terror of the wrestling rinks from Vladivostok to Vancouver, complete with
eyepatch and studded knuckles.
I was going to warn that legal eagle who
crossed swords with her the other day of his impending fate, but thought,
nah, a bit of schadenfreude never did any harm.

Anna Raccoon June 13, 2011 at 14:24