A few weeks ago I wrote an inconsequential piece about a strange experience in which I underwent a so called “peak” experience. My conclusion was that this was a real phenomenon which was created by a potent mix of exercise, joy, excitement and being in a natural environment which created a flood of endorphins and adrenalin. Therefore this “spiritual event” had a purely rational explanation.

I hinted at a follow up which had a less rational explanation.

I have been very nervous about putting one forward, because this piece may well get me sectioned as a fully paid up, card carrying, nut job. I will take the risk.

One evening, some years ago when I was in my early thirties, I was feeling a bit low. I had let someone down over some small thing and felt down and generally a bit tired. As was my wont I attended the local pub in the evening, and had a two or three pints (of beer not scotch). Nothing heavy.

I was walking back home still feeling a bit low and down on myself when suddenly “it” happened.

What “it” was a voice inside my head. That is a very strange thing to happen, at least for me. And it does not quite do the experience justice. It was a voice which seemed to speak directly to my consciousness. It was very clear, very calm, very precise, and it said the same short thing twice:

“You can have anything you want. You can have anything you want.”

And then –

Nothing. No sound of an angel flapping its wings as it flew away. No sound of Heaven’s door snapping shut. Rather unhelpfully (as I have often reflected afterwards), there was no explanation or instruction as to how this rather wonderful news might be carried into effect.

I remember one extra detail however, that may be significant. I was for the rest of the evening quite energised, as though I had a burst of adrenalin fuelled energy. Indeed, I found it hard to sleep because I felt slightly “electrified”.

Since then life has been the usual roller-coaster ride of ups with some quite sharp lows. I have not developed the power to fly, walk on water or turn water into wine. I have not been showered with wealth (far from it) and have generally messed up in various degrees both personal and professional life.

What then, was this strange phenomenon? Was the” message” simply a delusion?

It seems to me that there are four explanations.

One is that I am making it up. I ask you to reject that as irrational because I have nothing to gain and risk ridicule. Also, I don’t see what my point would be.

The next is that I suffered from some temporary insanity or was perhaps drunk. In short I imagined it. I have set out my alcohol intake faithfully and I don’t feel it was a cause. But why temporary insanity? And what provoked it? Just being a bit gloomy?

The third (perhaps developing the second) is that this was the product of my subconscious mind acting in some was to “kick start” my enthusiasm when I was feeling a bit low, or some such. Okay, more substance to that one I agree. All I can say is that it did not feel like that.

There is a fourth explanation, which is that there is a great deal more to the reality that we experience than might at first meet the eye and the relationship between our thoughts and what I will call in neutral terms “The Universe”.

I have often reflected on this message. I have read widely on matters esoteric, and not so esoteric. I think that I am not alone in experiencing some sort of moment of incredible insight. In the seminal work “Cosmic Consciousness” written in 1900, the psychiatrist Richard Bucke (who greatly influenced Jung, I believe) examined and theorized about the potential for a higher consciousness. As I recall, he suggested that many of those whom he takes as case studies for exhibiting this higher form of thought have some momentary intense insight which typically takes place in their early to mid thirties, just as I was.

However, in my own case I can hardly report that I feel I achieved a genuine “Higher Order of Consciousness”. In fact, I have often been rather stupid.

What then do I make of this phenomenon? Frankly, I think that it was a “real” experience and that it simply set out a fundamental truth which it was for me to make as much or as little of as I thought fit, although the agency of this message is rather perplexing. A truth which for some unfathomable reason what I call “The Universe” (put whatever name you want on it) prefers to be introduced indirectly. As in this well known poem:

I bargained with Life for a penny,
And Life would pay no more,
However I begged at evening
When I counted my scanty store;
For Life is a just employer,
He gives you what you ask,
But once you have set the wages,
Why, you must bear the task.
I worked for a menial’s hire,
Only to learn, dismayed,
That any wage I had asked of Life,
Life would have willingly paid.

Make of it what you will.

Gildas the Monk

(Photo Credit: Mad Monk)

Richard B November
1, 2011 at 09:41

Following from Ed P, and in no way supernatural or inexplicable, but I was
once left in a narrow streamway in a cave system deep under the Pennines. (The
party had split and I was waiting at the junction to ensure the two groups
recombined). I turned my light off to save battery, and sat in the total
darkness for about 30 minutes, with only the noise of the stream for company.
After a short while, I distinctly heard the sound of approaching voices and
the clink of carabiners on rock. This happened several times, and each time I
checked it out no-one was there. It’s the auditory system trying to make sense
of random noise, in the same way that we are programmed to see faces in all
sorts of things. However, when this happens you can never distinguish actual
words, no matter how clear the voices sound. That would not account for a
voice in the head, speaking a distinct message in a quiet environment.

Ed P November 1, 2011 at 07:35

I’ve been searching for a scientific explanation for these phenomena, as
I’ve had slightly similar experiences too. Try this:
Our view of the world
around us is well known to be a construct, refreshed by optical data in the
cortex. But the image we see is not what’s there so much as an interpretation
of our surroundings, with certain familiar shapes & edges “filled in” by
the brain to their full images (rather like MP4 video does with blocks to save
bandwidth). Sometimes an unusual or unexpected movement, usually at the
periphery of the eye’s view and therefore not focussed on the macula, is
misinterpreted for an instant and appears as ghostly shape until the brain
reassesses the data and corrects the image field. Mostly these images are
ignored, but when light levels are poor they may be more frequent.
If one
applies the same, evolved image processing to sound, also highly interpreted
from the stereo aural input, it’s reasonable to assume similar effects will
occur. (Who hasn’t thought they heard a voice for a split second when an
unfamiliar noise – scraping metal, a door creaking, etc. – momentarily
disturbs the perceived sound field?)

GildasTheMonk
November 1, 2011 at 07:48

An interesting theory. My personal take? There is more to this world than
meets the eye!

Ed P November 1, 2011 at 09:30

Yes, I agree with that too.
It was too much to include in my waffle
above, but I’d like to add that the psycho-acoustic experiences, when
combined with tiredness or stress or background noise, could easily turn a
“seed” event, as I tried to describe, into a full coherent voiced
sentence.

Stabledoor October 31, 2011 at 14:27

Probably 3 – the brain can play tricks on you. How it is interpreted will
depend on individual circumstances. I had a similar experience as a lonely and
confused teenager which I interpreted as a message from God, probably because
that was what I wanted to happen (I saw the light a couple of years later in
the opposite direction and have been a confirmed atheist since) The point
being that depending on the individual emotional circumstances these things
can be interpreted a number of different ways and quite difficult to
rationalise at the time.

I also have had the “running high” a number of times which is almost
certainly due to release of endogenous endorphins and can be quite addictive,
although in my case they only kick in after about 45 minutes of running – very
pleasurable though

Ancient + Tattered
Airman October 30, 2011 at 22:51

Gildas, some time ago I think I recommended Barbara Thierings book Jesus
the Man. Did you ever get around to reading it?

GildasTheMonk
October 31, 2011 at 07:01

No, but I shall check that out as soon as possible. Thank you

john malpas October 30, 2011 at 21:53

and maybe the beer had been medicated.

GildasTheMonk
October 30, 2011 at 12:21

Very interesting observations! Thanks all

Michael October 30, 2011 at 11:32

Apologies for the length of this comment
I
used to hitch-hike all over the place. I could fill a book with all the
interesting people I met. A posh young fella in a Jaguar XJ6 once picked me up
from Luton services and dropped me off outside my house in Leeds. Another time
I totally freaked a guy out by deducing from our five minutes of conversation
and the laptop in the boot (this was before they were commonplace) that he was
a travelling IT consultant. Coming back over the M62 once I got a lift with a
bohemian couple in an untaxed car who’d just nicked a tank full of petrol from
the petrol station just back up the slip road. Not only that, but the Greater
Manchester motorway cops happened to have their HQ in the same location. As
Zaphod Beeblebrox would say – 10 out of 10 for style, minus several million
for good thinking…
Anyway, this one particular time I was ten miles from
home, standing at the side of the road when I heard a voice clear as a bell,
but not physically audible, saying

“Don’t take the next lift you’re offered”.

I’m a believer, with faith in Jesus an’ everything – although clearly not a
very smart one at that point, as I rationalised the voice away when I got into
the back of the white Escort van that stopped shortly afterwards.
Inside
were a group of young teenage gypsy kids (including the driver), who were on
their way back from swimming in the local resevoir. The conversation was
peppered with implied threats and I was part prisoner, part curiosity, not
least when they took a turn off the road into their caravan
site.
Fortunately, I managed to talk my way out of the situation, without
losing too many bangles and wristbands in the process. But next time I’ll not
be so quick to dismiss that little voice…

macheath October
30, 2011 at 11:01

By an odd coincidence, half an hour before reading this, I was talking
about a very similar experience I had several years ago – a voice in my head
and and an overwhelming – and lasting- sense of well-being, security and
reassurance .

No mystery about what caused mine, though – it took place in an MRI
scanner. It’s been shown that electro-magnetic stimulation can produce the
sensations often reported by self-proclaimed ‘UFO abductees’, and the
phenomenon hs been tentatively linked to sub-stations, pylons and pressure
along geological fault lines.

An interesting hypothesis suggests that some of the major revelatory
religious experiences of scripture may have been a result of such geological
factors in the mountainous regions that are frequently the scenes of divine
communication.

That ‘electrified’ feeling of yours may have been an entirely accurate
description.

SadButMadLad
October 30, 2011 at 13:51

Maybe Gildas was walking under an electricity pylon at the time?

I go with the fifth explanation. Random firings of nerves in the brain
that just happen to fire in the auditory part of the brain, or visual if you
see a vision.

Matt Wardman
October 30, 2011 at 16:24

There’ll be no third time then, if we’re getting those “Y-shaped”
ones.

zaphod October 30, 2011 at 10:12

Imagine if remembered dreams were very rare.

You’d be utterly amazed at the occasional experience of one. All that
complicated narrative, including things that you wouldn’t ever have thought of
yourself. You would be tempted to put it down to something external and
supernatural.

The mind is much more complex than we realise. Consciousness is like a
two-dimensional surface of a three-dimensional phenomena.

I have something vaguely similar to your experience, at a time of great
stress. A “voice”, saying “Relax.” Very slow and persuasive. I pretty much
melted through the floor.

But there are people out there who hear a voice saying, “Kill”. Let’s not
give this too much credence.

GildasTheMonk
October 30, 2011 at 09:25

Every detail of this post is “true” in the sense that it was my faithful
recollection of what occurred. I should be most interested to hear how many
others may have had a similar experience

Antisthenes October 30, 2011 at 08:58

Note that those with low IQ have little to none experience of this
phenomena…………. and I should add………. if they did would believe in your 4 as
well.

Antisthenes October 30, 2011 at 08:54

If you want to be sectioned go for 4, reason however would dictate 3. It is
quite normal to receive revelation/inspiration when mulling things over in
your mind consciously or subconsciously. It is a jumbled collection of
knowledge, experience and intelligence trying to make sense of thoughts and
ideas. Note that those with low IQ have little to none experience of this
phenomena and those with very high IQ sometimes a surfeit of it. The more
knowledge and experience you have the greater the benefit but the higher the
intelligence not necessarily so as you meet the law of diminishing returns and
are more likely to end up believing in your 4.

lilith October 30, 2011 at 08:25

I had one very like that Gildas. I too was blue at the time. Minding my own
business I suddenly heard “You will be healed in this life time” It was such a
surprise (and years later turned out to be true.) I don’t believe in
reincarnation so I have no idea where the “this life time” came from.

GildasTheMonk
October 30, 2011 at 09:26

Thank you. Most interesting.

JuliaM October 30,
2011 at 06:57

Why immediately assume that your telepathic interlocuter was on the side of
the angels?