MP in the Sh*t. – The Anna Raccoon Archives

by Anna Raccoon on September 8, 2012

Sir Tony Baldry hasn’t had a good day. First he got a parking ticket when he just popped into Poundland, as your average penny saving MP does.

Then he bent down to retrieve the parking ticket whilst starting his car up. Whoops! Car lurches forward and hits portable toilet.

Now covered in er, effluent, and toilet paper, the car lurched over a three foot high boundary wall and landed on top of four vehicles parked in the council owned car park below.

Late for his constituency meeting he was further delayed when the police insisted on breathalysing him.

It was negative.

Did I hear somewhere that the government were thinking of bringing in a standard test for drug abuse?

Do we pay for MPs car insurance by any chance? Just asking.

{ 28 comments }

Miss Chips September 10, 2012 at 14:24

Poor Sir Tony! I think, in fairness, I should mention in passing that the
car park in question is one where you take a ticket at the entry barrier; the
dropped ‘ticket’ was probably one from the machine rather than a penalty
notice, as he had just arrived on his way to a meeting.

I live not a million miles from the scene of the accident. This morning, I
overheard two women in Banbury describing what had happened “when our Tracy
was in Matalan last Friday.”

It seems Tracy heard a crash outside the shop and a lot of shouting so,
naturally, went to see what was happening.

“There was a car that had crashed outside the car park; someone said he was
trying to get out without paying. It was a big expensive car – you’d think he
wouldn’t miss a few quid for parking. Tracy saw him; some bloke in a suit.
Businessman or something, Tracy said.”

It seems that none of the onlookers recognized the man who has been their
MP for the past 29 years, despite his regular appearances in town and on the
local papers.

How are the mighty fallen!

GildasTheMonk September 9, 2012 at 12:03

I would tend to poo poo many of these antics. There is too much loos talk
around. Time for a revolution; Smash the Cistern!

Hysteria September 9, 2012 at 13:07

Respect …. can’t compete with that – !

Ted Treen September 9, 2012 at 20:14: No doubt your comment has left Gildas flushed with pride…

2mac September 9, 2012 at 10:51

The article does not mention which party he is from. May I suggest he is in
the Lavi-Tories.

Seems it was all a misunderstanding. He received a memo from leader of
party saying they have to save pounds & attack waste.

Hysteria September 9, 2012 at 11:09: too good ….!

macheath September 9, 2012 at 10:40

You’ve got to feel sorry – a bit –
For a chap made to feel a right
twerp
By the media commotion
After untoward motion
Left him bruised
and bespattered with shame.

Woman on a Raft September 9, 2012 at 08:01

Oh please let there be CCTV.

Anna Raccoon September 9, 2012 at 08:48

Don’t be silly Mrs Raft, you know perfectly well that there won’t have
been any film in that particular camera.

An oversight naturally, but lessons will have been learned and procedures
put in place to ensure that there is film in that camera ever more…..

Ted Treen September 9, 2012 at 20:13: I wonder why the term “…but lessons will have been learned and
procedures put in place…” disturbs my normally relatively placid nature,
and makes me want to reach for a gun.

Hysteria September 8, 2012 at 23:28

anyway – I guess the s**t’s hit the fan now….

Hysteria September 8, 2012 at 23:27

when I read the incident report, I knew the regulars would come up with
some good’s – I was not disappointed.

macheath September 8, 2012 at 21:20

Had to share the Spouse’s reaction: “So he demolished into a portaloo and
crashed into Poundland in Banbury; now that’s what I call a classy
accident!”

Brian September 9, 2012 at 15:27

A very appropriate location in Austerity Britain – did the accident
reveal the real meaning of “we’re all in it together”?

Miss Chips September 9, 2012 at 17:05

It’s certainly appropriate; round the back of Poundland, McDonalds and
Wilkinsons (where Peacocks used to be) and next door to Matalan, the
10-pin bowling alley and the back door of Argos – I’m starting to wonder
whether the surroundings induced some sort of matter/anti-matter vortex
when Sir Tony ventured in.