Party Time! – The Anna Raccoon Archives

by Anna Raccoon on June 1, 2011

Hello my darlings – I haven’t half missed you all!

Rural France excels at things like growing lettuces, keeping families together, fostering community spirit; by heck, it struggles when asked to integrate with the modern high tech world.

I have moved house over the past week, only a matter of around 100 yards, but it requires engaging with French bureaucracy on about 74 different levels. 73 of them failed totally.

Hence I have had no internet for the past week (apologies to those of you who have e-mailed me) one of my neighbours has lost his phone number for ever, I will have a new e-mail address by the end of the week. Although this house has been in the same road for the past two hundred years, the Mairie have yet to get around to giving it an address which is creating all sorts of problems, and the only internet I have is precarious via wi-fi from outside another neighbours house. If it’s raining, I shan’t be posting!

Amidst all the chaos, it’s my birthday; another year older, another minuscule pension comes on stream – so I thought I’d blow it all on you…..

Drinks are on the house tonight, doubles all round. No bar staff, you’ll just have to serve yourself – Sad and Matt deserve a night off they’ve done sterling work over the past week.

If you can find the Pork Scratchings, help yourself, just check the sell by date, some of them were ordered in this time last year……

{ 23 comments }

Gloria Smudd June 2, 2011 at 19:37

A bleated* Happy Birthday to you Anna and many Happy Raccoons of the day
for yesterday! I hope your birthday was punctuated by more than one
badly-warbled rendition of The Birthday Dirge and that you enjoyed your first
birthday in your new abode.

* bleated/belated – much the same thing in my case!

backwoodsman June 2, 2011 at 09:45

Happy birthday, Anna and welcome back !
The thing is, ever since old
Bernard built the house, Oh, 200 years ago, everyone in the village knew it
was Bernards house, what more of an address do you need ! Rural logic.
Its
a bit like the right angle bend on the lane into the village, with the deep
ditch and the dodgy camber. ‘Well, he shouldn’t have gone so fast round there,
should he?’ says one old boy to his neighbour, as yet another another
unsuspecting visitor ends up ditched.

penny_dreadful June 2, 2011 at 09:22

Happy birthday!

Caedmon’s Cat June 2, 2011 at 08:38

Yum – I love pork scratchings – especially when they’re past their sell-by
date; they improve like a good wine. Many happy returns for yesterday, Anna –
and welcome back to the mad, mad world of the blogosphere..!

Daedalus X. Parrot June 2, 2011 at 07:05

A belated happy birthday Anna.

Hope the house move went OK (despite the 74 bureaucracies you dealt
with).

Did you remember to pack the kettle?

Châtelaine June 2, 2011 at 00:14

Happy birthday, Anna. I’ll open a bottle of Lalande Pomerol for you :-)

And don’t hold your breath. The French are lazy, uninterested, unorganised
and incompetent, but somehow, some day they’ll get to it. They always do – in
the END ;-)

Livewire June 2, 2011 at 05:15: Ha ha, that’s worthy of a rhymer.

We Brits shout the truth to the world
As if from a banner
unfurled
They’re lazy and daft
But we act like a raft
On a sea
where our insults are hurled

Welcome back Anna, you might consider old-fashioned dial-up (USB modem)
as a temporary measure, slow as hell for graphics but OK for email and most
browsing.
If uploading graphics you could reduce the pic size to speed
things up, people might whinge, but be diplomatic & say they’re wrecking
their vision with excessive self-stimulation.

Giolla Decair June 1, 2011 at 23:02

happy birthday, have fun

jez June 1, 2011 at 20:45

Very Happy Birthday Anna. I can understand the internet problems. I’ve a
Niece who stays in a small rural community called Pre en Pail. I’ve lost count
of the changes in email addresses. Broadband is but a distant dream, yet her
quality of life is appears to be very special indeed.

John B June 1, 2011 at 20:39

Happy birthday and many more. All success with the house.

Engineer June 1, 2011 at 20:27

Happy new home, Anna, and may you have many more birthdays.

P.S. Hope the hairbrush has resurfaced…

Catherine in Athens June 1, 2011 at 20:02

Happy birthday, Anna, and many happy returns!

WitteringWitney June 1, 2011 at 19:58

Happy Birthday Anna – and a Happy Welcome to your new home!

ivan June 1, 2011 at 19:41

Very glad you’re back and a very happy birthday Anna.

Practical matters: If you are only 100 m or less from a router then a
length of Cat5 cable with plugs on both ends would solve the internet problem
for a while. In fact that is what I do here – a friend has a reasonable
connection while I would have a lousy one due to the vagaries of FT and where
they put the cables (can’t wait for Free to do the degroupage here) so I run a
cable from his place to mine and use his net connection as payment for looking
after the house and any people that rent it.

You have my number if you want any more info.

Macheath June 1, 2011 at 19:08

Good to see you back! Many happy returns and all the best for the new
abode.

microdave June 1, 2011 at 19:07

Happy Birthday! If you are using a router with an external aerial try
making a simple reflector from some cooking foil, and positioning it behind
the aerial, facing towards your neighbour. It might just make the difference
between marginal and usable…

Cascadian June 1, 2011 at 19:05

A new house for your birthday, no doubt you deserve it, please add my
congratulations to those already received, hope you enjoy the day to the
fullest..

Is not technology wonderful? we are scheduled for an upgrade on our
IP-based TV and internet service this Friday, faster downloads , improved
viewing experience, facebook-enabled TV-yuk!, no charge, and we are assured
all the work will be done at the local telcom facility with minimal
disruption, we have also been advised that the electrical utility will be
doing a transformer upgrade on 6 June-so it will be a small-scale electrical
D-day around here, what could possibly go wrong?

Katabasis June 1, 2011 at 18:58