The 25-Hour News and The Immigration News They Buried…
Over here, over fed, and probably over sexed. These bastards and bitches have been flooding in through the port of Dover via Calais, with barely a cursory intervention by the authorities.
A multi-national invasion, every colour under the rainbow, and there is nothing we can do about it, since the immigration rules were changed. The pedigree of immigrant has plummeted ever since their chums at the EU decided to open Europe’s borders to any cheeky chappie with the right passport; before long, every uncouth mongrel under the sun will be knocking at Britannia’s front door, permeating the nation with a rancid whiff on a par with the kind of tripe even a butcher would turn his nose up at. No wonder the Great British public have a bone to pick with Brussels. Many of these new arrivals to our shores claim to have been hounded out of their own countries, but to the ears of most Brits there is more than a ring of a shaggy dog story about their tales of woe.
‘Disgusted of Kent’, and ‘Dismayed of Tonbridge’ complain in vain – the media scared to report the truth. Is there no politician to stand up for the true British breed? Churchill certainly wouldn’t have said ‘Oh, yes’ to this invasion.
Their numbers have been growing since 2001. Thousands have arrived just in this dog-gone year alone, and they are taking the place of true Brits…at Crufts!
As soon as they were let into the country, they cocked a leg snook at the fine British tradition of letting the home boy win and started walking off with the top prizes, first a Norwegian, then a Yankee Terrier.
For the past couple of years, Crufts have allowed hairspray, cosmetics, and other ‘performance enhancers’; now owners fear that some woofer of a French poodle might walk off with the top prize…
They have resorted to taking out paid ads in showbiz magazines guaranteeing minimum wage to those who will join their protest…
Why didn’t UKIP think of that?
-
February 28, 2015 at 10:27 am -
-
February 28, 2015 at 1:17 pm -
No Essex I’m British
-
-
February 28, 2015 at 10:29 am -
Oh well, We’d battersea what happens next.
-
February 28, 2015 at 11:31 am -
Enough of the puppy-puns – how about a bit of doggerel ?
-
February 28, 2015 at 11:40 am -
” how about a bit of doggerel ?”
is that the past tense of ‘dogging’? I doggereled, thou doggerelst, we all bloody doggereled …..?
ps. love the poem!
-
-
February 28, 2015 at 11:36 am -
So Cameron’s promise was rocked,
As those immigrants couldn’t be blocked.
Once his reign is over,
The White Cliffs of Dover,
Could be yellow, from all those legs cocked.-
February 28, 2015 at 11:47 am -
Ed- Shharrpei sum masshtiff ?
-
-
February 28, 2015 at 11:40 am -
Britains not exactly NEWFOUNDLAND!
-
February 28, 2015 at 11:45 am -
What’s the difference between Chappie and Cameron? Chappie (other dog foods are available) contains brains.
-
February 28, 2015 at 1:01 pm -
Chappie? Good to see uz getting down wiv de kidz
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chappie_%28film%29
Been seeing this advertised on buses last week and thought it an odd-looking PR campaign for a dog-food that time had forgot…
-
-
-
February 28, 2015 at 12:50 pm -
Made me smile
I have been saying for a long time – the country has gone to the dogs. They come in, eating our biscuits, and bringing their WAGS with them. It’s a sorry tail, and one which gives paws for thought. It’s an open labradoor policy
On a serious note, what that silly sod is doing to that dog really annoys me. Dogs should be natural, sleek, athletic, wriggly, sneaky, and well looked after. Not treated as a fashion statement. Bloody people. And on another note, depending on our new landlord’s discretion, we may have a canine theme going all weekend. Synchronicity?
-
February 28, 2015 at 12:54 pm -
Just heard the 25 Hour News. Brilliant! Still grinning! Bullseye!
-
February 28, 2015 at 4:17 pm -
That poodle photo:
A colleague glanced over my shoulder, looked at the perpetrator and wondered aloud “I wonder if the guy practices the styles on his own pubes?”
-
February 28, 2015 at 6:49 pm -
” Best In Show” from Spinal Tap director Christopher Guest covers the subject quite well!!
-
February 28, 2015 at 11:51 pm -
The lefty/greenie/PC brigade that are around in my corner of the woods have been getting pretty excited about dogs recently. There is just too much pooh about. Firstly ryey so rated stencils on the pavements with a wee picture of a dog doing its business and a short message asking people to bag it. Guess what, it didn’t help much. Now they have moved the game on and the have established the Jobby Lobby. They are lobbying the local politicians to put pressure on the council to get prior to bag their pouches jobbies and then bin them.
There are also a couple of dog owners who don’t use cars since they pollute the world apparently. Anyway they have panniers which they put on their dogs which they fill with shopping etc. it looks a bit silly and well worth a chortle obviously. There is the 7 gallon bladder dog that relieves itself copiously. We don’t have any rat on a rope versions though.
Such is life in Edinburgh, the city of unwanted trams, 20 mph speed limits and every silly possible scheme you can think off.
-
March 1, 2015 at 9:38 am -
* There is just too much pooh about *
They do say bears shit in the woods.In my neck of the dogshit woods I’m noticing an increasing tendency for doog-owners to bag it and then leave it dangling in the nearest bushes like some preternatural Xmas bauble. Given that there is a lot of fauna in the woods that would make a fine meal of a dog-jobby this seems entirely counter-productive since most estimates suggest these jobby-baubles will remain dangling in the bushes until about 2035, before finally the UV allows the nourishment back into the circle of life, by which time all the animals that feast on dogshit will have long succumbed to famine.
-
-
March 1, 2015 at 1:22 am -
OMG! Dogging! Anna, how could you?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MXzaVOk_Ydk
{ 17 comments… read them below or add one }