Britain’s shame is complete. Overnight I have been digging into the ‘technical problems’ that beset our mercy flights to collect British citizens stranded in Muammar Gaddafi’s murderous Hellhole in the desert.

I am embarrassed to report back to you.

No gunboats, no Hercules, Hague’s mercy mission rests on the ‘X’ factor.

The British government didn’t tell British Airways to get back in the air and collect its citizens – they sent for the planes piloted by Britain’s number one headbanger – Bruce Dickinson, the man who gave up warbling:

The rising dead, faces bloated, torn
They are relieved, the living wait their turn

To act as Marketing Manager and Chief Pilot on mercy flights for a little outfit called Astraeus Airlines whose previous claim to fame was that they were the only airline to operate a B757 combi passenger and cargo aircraft – mainly so that they could use the plane to fly Iron Maiden on the 2008 tour. Bruce Dickinson doubled as both lead singer and Pilot of the B757…

Ultimately owned by an Icelandic travel company, they have kept themselves airborne by specialising in flying Hajj pilgrims to and fro the Middle East.  Mind you, they also fly the kids to Finland for their winter visit to ‘Santa’.

Since May of last year they have been operating a continuous schedule of behalf of the Ministry of Defence flying troops to and fro the Middle East.

It is scarcely surprising that they were late taking off from Gatwick – the latest industry figures show that 17% of their flights are ‘excessively late’, 6% ‘very late’, and 12% merely ‘late’.

Astraeus Airlines endeared themselves to our present government when they provided unmarked planes to keep ‘BA passengers flying even when its planes are not’ during the recent strike action by BA cabin staff. Nothing much has changed – BA stops flying to Tripoli and Astraeus steps into the breech once more. Eventually.

– and we were worried about sharing our aircraft carriers with the French!

David Boycott
February 27, 2011 at 23:28

“Saying things like “we won’t bribe Libyian officials” so that our planes
or ships can land/dock is being a bit precious.”

Au contraire, one must comply with the anti-bribery legislation introduced
by New Labour or face a jail term.

carol42 February 25, 2011 at 18:41

Hi Mike, as I recall it wasn’t as bad at the end of 78, I had quite a few
friends who had children leaving then but I opted to stay with my husband. We
actually went to Turkey for a week in Dec.78 and still thought it might settle
down as it seemed to be heading for some sort of democracy with Khomeni as a
benevolent religious figure – we all know how that turned out! watching the
demonstrations in Egypt brought it all back. The Iranian revolution was very
similar, students, middle class etc. and they certainly didn’t want the
theocracy they got. We loved Iran and always hoped to go back one day, being
forced to leave always felt like unfinished business, sadly my husband died
four years ago so that won’t happen now. I think we were the only Brits on our
evacuation, most had left by then. A few people we knew that had to get out
after 11th. Feb. said it was a nightmare and some literally got out with what
they were wearing. That was when any sense of law and order collapsed, I agree
the Iranian people were great and very helpful when things got rough, my
neighbour took me shopping so she could do all the talking. I got caught up in
a demonstration once and was rescued by another Iranian girl who spoke
English, we got an orange cab and they were all shouting ‘death to the Shah’
and I had to join in! it was quite an experience.

Mike Spilligan
February 25, 2011 at 11:33

Speedy decisions are essential. Similar to Carol 42 I was in Tehran at the
end of 1978 and left by BA in January ’79. Their flights were coming in and
leaving without local air traffic control, i.e. on visual flight rules (but
possibly breaking some company rules?) and local BA groundstaff – many Iranian
– were extremely helpful. BA had quickly organized evacuation flights via
Kuwait, meaning that extra aircraft and aircrews were needed. Of course 30
years is a long time and more than enough for degeneration to set in.

Subrosa February
25, 2011 at 02:13

The military don’t just do logistics and management SBML. They rescue
people because they’re the professionals. Our SAS – or what’s left of it – is
the best in the world.

I agree until now it didn’t require military personnel to evacuate British
citizens but it developments in the past 24 hours are putting the lives of oil
workers in the desert at risk because they can’t get to the airport or port.
Who can get them their now their employers say it’s impossible? Only our
military are left so they will be asked to do it.

Let’s look at this objectively. Many Brits go to the likes of Libya to work
because they’re paid far more handsomely there than they would be here and
that goes for oil workers too. They go for the money. Most Brits have woken up
and realised they have to get out and because civilian air flights were
erratic many have been stuck at the airport. Most oil companies took the
majority of their workers out a week ago yet left some in the desert to keep
the stuff flowing. Last weekend most countries became aware of their citizens
stuck at the airport so supplied aircraft to take them to their country of
residence. Britain didn’t. Is it any wonder why they didn’t when Cameron is
floating about on a PR stint in the Middle East while Nick Clegg is allegedly
at his holiday home in Switzerland saying he possibly is running the country
and it can all be done by blackberry and email?

The situation is now very serious and the British have to be brought out
asap. That will have to be done by our military because no civilian company
would touch it with a bargepole. For a start they wouldn’t get insurance.

Other countries have used their armed forces quietly and brought their own
out. Unfortunately, because we have leaders who don’t have a damned clue about
anything other than money, we’re way behind by our non-action. I just hope
none of our military is killed because of it.

Cascadian February 24, 2011 at 23:44

Interesting comments, carol42 relates how employment by a US company is
probably better for your longevity than a british passport.

Of course the apologiser-in-chief (formerly PM Camoron) assures all and
sundry here
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/cameron-apologises-for-libya-rescue-delays-2224310.html
that
“lessons have been learned” well thats OK then, pretty much the same as
Heathrow snow clearing if I remember correctly. He seems to feel that you
should be very sorry for him because he has taken on a job “that is extremely
difficult” ye gods! Also as leader of the government (although there seems to
be some doubt about that too) “I don’t understand why they weren’t operating
through Cobra to secure the support of the RAF at an earlier stage. ” So we
are left to believe that “they” (hey I thought he was in charge, and could
dial it in on his Blackberry) are incompetent duds, and for once I agree with
the Camoron. Here I agree with sadbutmadlad the foreign office is useless and
the RAF incapable of independent action.

So we had better rely on another arm of the armed services-the one
celebrated for surrendering to Iran at the slightest hint of a fight, once
again the once invincible and proud royal navy covers itself in glory
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/africa/britons-return-home-telling-of-libya-chaos-2224187.html
I
quote:”HMS Cumberland’s departure from Libya will be delayed because of choppy
waters, Foreign Office minister Alistair Burt said.
The Type 22 frigate
docked in the Arab country’s second city earlier today to evacuate scores of
Britons to the Maltese port of Valetta.
But its voyage has been delayed
because of tricky sea conditions.
Mr Burt told Sky News: “The Cumberland
has already docked, it’s taking passengers on. They won’t be going straight
away because the sea conditions aren’t very nice.”

Diddums-”the sea conditions aren’t very nice.” is this an effing emergency
evacuation or a daytrip from Southend pier?

A further eyewitnesses reports”Chinooks flew over our house and there were
machine gun blasts shortly afterwards.” of course they were not british
chinooks because we know they are neatly stored in heated splendour while they
await a british designed software system. Go-orn yer pulling my leg-no
sir.

And to top it all off the Camoron cabinet have now co-ordinated press
releases from the culture secretary’s office, he assures us that the SAS are
ready to be deployed. Somehow that announcement from somebody whose briefings
usually mention the royal opera house or the national ballet seems calibrated
not to strike fear in the hearts of our enemies.

In case anybody has forgotten how to run a country without it looking like
a Keystone cops movie let me leave you with this.

http://instapunk.com/images/Lockerbie-bomber-Abdelbas-002.jpg

Do you see that, that is how a third-world country operates, it sends a
nice, modern, shiny effing plane to pick up its stranded civilians (singular
in this case)

If the camoron does not demand the immediate resignation of the foreign
secretary, minister of defence and minister culture on his return he is a
bigger fool than I take him for (impossible surely) followed by a 75% cut in
air marshalls, commodores and admirals and a 100%in all military procurement
staff give the job of renewing the naval fleet to RNLI, buy all future
aircraft through the US from existing proven models.

Michael Parker
February 24, 2011 at 22:58

I can’t see the problem here. The Government needed to charter/wet lease
some aircraft, presumably this lot offered the best price. They have all the
relevant flying licences, seem to have a lot of well known clients (e.g.
various football clubs) so why not use them. The better question to be asking
the FCO is whether the contract with Astraeus for this airlift included some
clawback in the event of poor on-time performance.

For reference, here’s a list of all UK airlines – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Template:Airlines_of_the_United_Kingdom
as
we don’t have a flag carrier, surely any would be suitable?

Or is this just an amusing story about how the company they’ve gone with
happen to employ a famous singer as a pilot?

carol42 February 24, 2011 at 20:57

I think people are being a bit unfair on the Government, they have no idea
what it is like in that sort of situation. My late husband and I were in
Teheran until Feb. 1979 and it was chaos with so many trying to get out, and
the UK was behind the curve then too. We were very lucky in that my husband
worked for an American Co. and, as there was a large military base and
airport, and they evacuated us from there in a huge C5 carrier. The most
frightening thing was the drive to the airport, we had an Iranian ‘military
escort’ who deserted the buses halfway there. People were standing on the road
shouting death to America and it would only have taken one person to start
throwing rocks, there were plenty there. I cannot fault the American
evacuation to Greece, they were really well organized even down to having vets
at the airport and cash available. Certainly they had a lot more time as it
took a few months to fall apart whereas Libya seemed to collapse very quickly.
Things are never as simple as they look and I really wonder how they are going
to get to the oil workers in the desert. From what I remember those evacuated
by BA had a much harder time, having to use the main airport which was totally
chaotic, just like Libya now.

Subrosa February
24, 2011 at 18:10

I completely disagree with you SadButMadLad. Our armed forces are those
with the expertise in a situation such as this and it is extremely important
that such specialist skills are always available so as we, as a bunch of
islands, can protect our own.

Our military aren’t only trained to fight you know. They have far wider
skills than using a weapon. Thankfully.

The FO has left it far too late. Civilians won’t want to go into such a
situation because they know they’re not capable of coping should something
untoward happen and that is very likely. That’s why the government couldn’t
just call on some of their pals such as Richard Branson and co.

SadButMadLad
February 24, 2011 at 19:18

I wasn’t talking about the actual soldiers who quite rightly can do more
than just shoot guns. However the specialist skills that are required are
more the management and logistical ones in organising the evacuation. That
doesn’t require all the warplanes and destroyers, it requires planes or
ships be they military or commercial.

Surprisingly it doesn’t require only miltary personnel to do the
evacuation. It’s not like each evacuee needs to be protected by a soldier as
they get to the airport/port. They are getting their own their own so its
only the mass evacuation part that is required. Civilians and commercial
companies can easily do it. Yes, there is a lot of violence going on but
there are still many flights going in and out of Tripoli. There are other
airports/airfields. Look at how other countries are coping.

Where the skills have been seriously lacking is in the FO. It has always
been a department that doesn’t understand what is going in the world.

Helen February 24, 2011 at 14:49

Interesting little blog (mainly on Astraeus), if a bit weirdly dated. As
Smoking says, Dickinson won’t be doing any rescue flights, he’s at work with
his band in the Far East at the moment. When he is not working with the band,
he flies nearly full time, as the band only tours part of the year, and not
every year. He doesn’t fly the tour plane by himself, they carry 4-6 pilots
depending on how far they are going. Who was late taking off from Gatwick
when?? Old pilots with Jack Daniels and the famous Dakotas sound great, but
these days airliners are used, they are bigger, and their pilots fly
commercial licence rules … probably safer for everyone, and uses less string.
Glad to hear it if Astraeus are providing backup services to the Government.
They were doing this long before Dickinson became marketing director, he flies
as an ordinary Captain with them. He doesn’t warble, he is the “air raid
siren” and has been for decades

SadButMadLad
February 24, 2011 at 14:48

What happened to our arm, navy, airforce during the Labour years has no
bearing on handling the situation in Libya. We’re not going there to fight
them. What we need is means of getting British citizens back to Blighty. What
we use doesn’t matter, but it’s how we do it that does.

Getting our finger out, cajoling businesses to lend a hand, paying above
market rates to charter aircraft, etc is what we should be doing. Saying
things like “we won’t bribe Libyian officials” so that our planes or ships can
land/dock is being a bit precious.

It’s not that the end justifies the means as realising that in real life
sometimes difficult decisions need to be made. Just like cuddling up with
Gaddafi in times when he looked and acted OK even though it doesn’t look nice
now (cf. Sadam in Iraq, or the Shah in Iran, etc. etc).

Netherlands got their people out, but they only have around a couple
hundred. Germany a few more but easily handled in a few planes. Britain has a
few thousand so a bit more of a logistical issue, but not insurmountable. I
mean Turkey has tens of thousands and they’ve sent ships and got their people
out ahead of us. Now that is embarrassing.

Michael
Fowke February 24, 2011 at 13:37

It’s a shame they sold the Navy off. Otherwise we could send an aircraft
carrier or two.

Smoking
Hot February 24, 2011 at 13:04

Oop’s … #pilot# #of#

Smoking
Hot February 24, 2011 at 13:03

Hope Bruce lives up to his image. The mental picture l get is off a piolt l
knew in USA, he has DC3 and it’s got a very loud music system, supply of Jack
Daniels and Marlboro’s. Steve Olore is his name. The British Government
should’ve sent for him. The DC3 has a reputation for mercy/rescue flights …
Berlin being the most famous. DC3 is more commonly known as the Dakota.

JuliaM February
24, 2011 at 12:43

It’d be worth being stranded in Tripoli if you were rescued by Iron
Maiden!

Smoking
Hot February 24, 2011 at 12:33

Eh? … Bruce and Iron Maiden are on tour. Yesterday in Melbourne, today
Sydney and tomorrow Brisbane.

Anna
Raccoon February 24, 2011 at
12:37

They have seven planes Smoking.
Seven more than the British government
seem to possess to get our people out of Libya…..
The Hercules never did
get their replacements.

Smoking Hot February 24, 2011 at 12:46

Maybe so but Bruce hasn’t given up warbling, he rejoined Iron Maiden in
1999. Bruce hasn’t had much time for any mercy flights either, their
current World Tour began a year ago.

Richard Manns
February 24, 2011 at 12:14

I don’t follow; what’s the shame?

I guess it’s the same of BA incompetence, but it’s not clear. We all know
what the unions have done to that company; it’s just an illustration that
someone else will step in.