Let’s put the pensioners in jail and the criminals in a nursing home. Solves two problems in one.

Pensioners

This way the pensioners would have access to showers, hobbies and walks.

They’d receive unlimited free prescriptions, dental and medical treatment, wheel chairs etc and they’d receive money instead of paying it out.

They would have constant video monitoring, so they could be helped instantly, if they fell, or needed assistance.

Bedding would be washed twice a week, and all clothing would be ironed and returned to them.

A guard would check on them every 20 minutes and bring their meals and snacks to their cell.

They would have family visits in a suite built for that purpose.

They would have access to a library, weight room, spiritual counselling, pool and education.

Simple clothing, shoes, slippers, PJ’s and legal aid would be free, on request.

Private, secure rooms for all, with an  exercise outdoor yard, with  gardens.

Each pensioner could have a PC a TV radio and daily phone calls.

There would be a board of directors to hear complaints, and the guards would have a code of conduct that would be strictly adhered to.

Prisoners

The criminals would get cold food, be left all alone and unsupervised. Lights off at 8pm, and showers once a week.  Live in a tiny room and pay £600.00 per week and have no hope of ever getting out.

Think about it.

H/t Peter Sawyer who got it from somewhere

SBML

Ian R ThorpeFebruary 12, 2011 at 18:35

Votes for prisoners is no big deal, there aren’t enough of them and they
are not in the right places to swing elections. So I’ll accept it when the
Brituish Parliament votes for it but never while it is imposed by a court of
bureaucrats in Stasbourg

ZaphodFebruary 12, 2011 at 08:21

Liz, there’s a prison near my work. There are always good-looking girls
queueing outside for visits. I think that demonstrates something, but I’m not
sure what.

LizFebruary 12,
2011 at 02:19

Zapphod, was a prison visitor (ex boyfriend was a kleptomaniac) – he was in
and out like a fiddlers thingy and it weren’t pretty at all in any prison I
visited, he was though, which was why I went. Lovely bloke, always nicked a
decent Cartier lighter for you. Poor love. I expect they’ve improved some and
not others to keep us all arguing.

ZaphodFebruary 11, 2011 at 19:23

I’ve been in prison, (for possession of a small quantity of cannabis).

Anyone who hasn’t been in prison, but believes that it’s rather nice, is
talking out of their arse.

Notice my commendable restraint?

AllanFebruary 11, 2011 at 13:55

We could also use Universities in the same way and put the Pensioners in
there! I would be quite happy to do some of the courses a second time
around.

TacitusFebruary 11, 2011 at 08:23

You know the frightening thing? The elderly would almost certainly have a
better standard of care than they receive at the moment. Our provision for
those with pre-senile dementia is sadly below par and, as someone who has had
a stroke, I can assure you the facilities for stroke survivors are pretty
limited.

On the other hand, prisons are warm, clean and they receive regular grub.
Course, they can’t get out much, but there again, the Tories want to take away
OAP bus passes anyway, so that won’t matter much.

gladiolysFebruary 11, 2011 at 07:00

I know you are using the comparison to make a serious point, but, to be the
fly in your ointment, it couldn’t happen – there are considerably more
pensioners than prisoners, and their “sentence” of pensionerhood (?) is often
longer than that of the average prison stay.

HysteriaFebruary 10, 2011 at 22:23

This Sheriff in Arizona has the same line of thinking

http://urbanlegends.about.com/library/bl_sheriff_joe_arpaio.htm

While not everyone who reads the above will join in offering kudos to
Maricopa County’s “tough-guy Sheriff” Joe Arpaio, the recitation of his
controversial policies and public utterances is mostly accurate

DiocleseFebruary
10, 2011 at 21:34

Agree!

ZaphodFebruary 10, 2011 at 20:06

Is voting your right? Or is it a privelege which may be taken away by the
state as a punishment?
I think that this is an important question. I’m
surprised that so many Libertarians would surrender this “right” so
easily.

Ed PFebruary 10, 2011 at 21:34

A “right” is unearned privilege to a Libertarian. We have none – it’s one
of the many illusions with which the state fools us.

ZaphodFebruary 10, 2011 at 22:41

So, in your view, some individuals would earn the privelege of voting?
And some wouldn’t? Obedience to the current government’s statutes are one
prerequisite? Perhaps they may introduce further criteria?

Universal suffrage, what happened to that?

Caedmon’s
CatFebruary 11, 2011 at 09:44

The irony of criminals casting votes for their parliamentary
fellow-travellers is not lost on me…

Gildas theMonk
February 10, 2011 at 20:05

A good point! The treatment of the elderly and the treatment of prisoners
is scandalous for quite different reasons…
The world turned upside
down..

BluebellFebruary 10, 2011 at 19:52

The prisoners in an average care home would be stuck in armchairs lined up
around the perimeter of the so-called lounge and forced to watch television
all day whether they wanted to or not. They would be dressed in inappropriate,
non-colour matching clothing, just the first clean items available even if it
made them look stupid and undermined their dignity. Nobody would bother too
much if their finger nails went uncut and were broken – I could go on, but I
think your poster has the right idea about changing places!

Gloria Smudd
February 10, 2011 at 19:31

This made me titter.

Angry
ExileFebruary 10, 2011 at 18:59

I see the Commons gave the idea the flick, which just goes to show that
they’re not always as useful as a tit on a fish and can occasionally drag
themselves away from making their expenses more convincing to vote for
something that makes sense. But 234 to 22? What the hell were the rest of them
doing? Oh yeah, making their expenses more convincing probably.

Richard BFebruary
10, 2011 at 18:58

I like it. Visiting your granny in prison would probably be easier too.

PT BarnumFebruary 10, 2011 at 18:57

A small modification to a brilliant solution: place pensioners from ‘care’
homes into open prisons (with all the freebies you outline); put all MPs who
have ever lied to the public in Cat A prisons; put all those convicted of a
violent offence or any offence more than once into secure psychiatric units –
they make prisons look positively attractive.

TimOfEngland
February 10, 2011 at 18:37

I like it, except of course the pensioners are not robbing us of our stuff
and the criminals would, so they would end up better of than us and the
pensioners