And other cold weather jokesâ¦..
Blimey â weâve even got snow in the Dordogne this morning! The Pompiers were out at the crack of dawn pulling motorists out of ditches, and my neighbour has smoke coming out of his chimney â a sure sign that the temperature has dropped below -12, hardy little soul that he is.
Peppy, the Foxâs Glacier Mint Polar Bear has been towed south to avoid the global warming in the Arctic. That Gordon Brown really started something when he said he was going to save the world from global warming in 50 daysâ¦
Incidentally, the original Peppy was shot and stuffed to order to enable Foxâs chief artist to create the iconic image of a Polar Bear for an advertising campaign back in 1922 â those were the politically incorrect days, eh?
According to Dr David Viner, a senior research scientist at the climatic research unit (CRU) of the University of East Anglia,within a few years winter snowfall will become âa very rare and exciting eventâ.
A Bus Driver in Illinois has been forced to resign after the âbrutal murder of a snowmanâ built in the Bus Lane of a university campus â and a Facebook page started to âHelp the Bus Driver who killed the evil snowman get his job backâ.
The city of North Pole in Alaska has been unable to find enough citizens who could successfully pass the âchild sex offendersâ check to enable them to receive all the mail addressed to âSanta Claus at the North Poleâ so the US mail service is refusing to hand over letters containing the name and address of expectant children from all over the world (apparently Alaska is the Number 1 State in the âhighest number of perverts per square inchâ stakes, and last year a prolific sex offender was discovered gleefully opening letters from children asking him to come down their chimney..â¦)
And William Hill has declared that âsnow on the ground doesnât constitute a White Christmasââ¦..apparently a White Christmas is when snow falls on Christmas Day even if it is only one little snowflake, so donât count your winnings yet.
Anybody else got any SâNo Jokes? We need cheering up today as the country falls apart round us!