In a crowded field of insecure journalists who denigrate bloggers whilst avidly devouring every word we write â and frequently repeating them unattributed â Rod Liddle stands head and shoulders above every last man, woman and trained monkey employed to fill the space between the lucrative advertisements for walk in baths, incontinence pads, and slyly worded contact numbers for ladies â and small boys â of the night.
No wonder that they end up feeling so morally superior to those of us who write for free â and enjoyment.
The task for those of Liddle talent is to lure the unwitting, or perhaps the witless, behind the pay walls of their puppet masters; to create controversy, masquerading as high brow intellectual opinion, and pray that whilst there they might discover a pressing, or rather clicking, need to upgrade their âlift and riseâ armchair; for it is on the sale of those desperately boring items, rather than their gilded words, that the entire financial future of âprofessionalâ journalists rests.
A future which is disappearing down the pan faster than you can say âtalentless incontinence pad salesmanâ.
Why have I singled out Rod Liddle this morning? Well, from behind the paywall that Murdoch has secured round his salesman, has escaped this gem, courtesy of The Englishman;
Just who is Guido Fawkes, aka Paul Staines â the semi-literate, extreme-right-wing, public-school-educated, foreign-born former bankrupt and convicted criminal blogger whose ineptly written innuendoes may yet put an end to the career of one of Britainâs better politicians, William Hague?
Well, Mr Staines is Bloggsville incarnate â the very essence of that vast network of talentless and embittered individuals tapping away at their keyboards in the intellectual vacuum of cyberspace, only occasionally leaving their computer screens to heat up a Tesco microwave-ready mini filled garlic and coriander nan bread with Indian dip selection (mango chutney, pickle, cucumber raita ) before returning to spew out some more unsubstantiated bile.
This is anti-journalism, and nobody takes any notice of it â except, of course, the mainstream media and the government.
Ah, Mr Liddle jumping into the William Hague controversy! A controversy picked up by the main stream media from that vast network of talentless and embittered individuals whose words he obviously follows closely from his ivory pay wallâ¦â¦I wonder why?
It is not the words of Guido he denigrates â but a personal attack.
âSemi-literateâ â a fine choice of insult from a man who aspires to such literary gems as âSo â Harriet Harman, then. Would you? I mean after a few beers obviously, not while you were sober.â
âExtreme-right-wingâ â would that be as in fascist racist BNP loving right wing Mr Liddle? Mr Liddle, the man who the Press Complaints Commission censured for writing âthe overwhelming majority of street crime, knife crime, gun crime, robbery and crimes of sexual violence in London is carried out by young men from the African-Caribbean communityâ.
âPublic School-educatedâ â Yes, well, I suppose if you consider the Laurence Jackson comprehensive school gives you some sort of moral advantage in life, weâll let you have that one.
âForeign-bornâ? was that a compliment to Guido hidden away in there? After all, you do say that you were employed at The Sunday Times as an âin-house leftyâ â so you must mean foreign born as an asset to our nation, a prop for our dwindling economy, yes?
âFormer bankruptâ â ah, you read Tim Ireland too, do you? They do come in handy those darned bloggers donât they? Especially when you are stuck for something to write to ensure that you donât become a âPresent Bankruptâ yourself.
âConvicted criminalâ â are you the same Rod Liddle that accepted a police caution for a âheated domestic incidentâ involving your pregnant 23 year old girlfriend. Police caution v. convicted criminal â itâs not a stone I would have chosen to throw in your shoes, but then what do I know, a mere feral blogger?
When it comes to talentless and embittered individuals operating in an intellectual vacuum, I have to hand it you, you have us mere bloggers beat hands down. We cannot compete at your level.
I dare say Guido will go on chasing stories into your tent â and you will go on skinning them and claiming the credit.