There is a fine tradition stretching way back before the current incumbent of the name started his obsessive daily whine about the Independent Parliamentary Standards Authority (Ipsa) which shows how, to true Londoners, the Weegie-lite MP for Glasgow is appropriately named.
Up in the Weegie sewer, Tom’s surname may conjure up images of humble crofters summoning up the strength to shoot the shuttle across their loom and produce another meagre yard of the thorn proof cloth beloved of the local laird. It is only an image.
Down in London where the Ipsa civil servants live, the name has more colourful connotations.
For generations, those who talk out of their backside, were said to speak through their ‘Aristotle. A bit of a mouthful, later shortened to ‘bottle and glass’, and later on to simply ……
Down south, an ‘Harris’ is nothing more than an arsehole.
In fairness, you will occasionally hear someone referred to as a ‘Harris Tweed’, taking great care to enunciate the ‘h’ – in this case they are referring to a ‘weed’, the runt of the litter, the fourth child, invariable born mentally challenged as they say in these PC days.
Now, Tom dear, remember back a few years, you and your fellow Ministers took a thorough look over a civil service department that pays out expenses. You pronounced it fit for purpose. You arranged for it to move out to economical offices in Birmingham. You had not a word of complaint about delays or difficulty communicating with those civil servants. You were all as pleased as punch with it. Yes, you too, you voted for it. You thought it was a fine and dandy way in which to ensure that the right money went to the right people at the right time.
So why don’t you campaign to have parliamentary expenses doled out by that out-of-town, fit for purpose, quasi banking service that you were all so proud of setting up?
It’s called the Public Guardianship Office…….they have bags of experience at dealing with abusive idiots trying to get money out of vulnerable people……