Well, new management folks! There will be an ‘alternative Ms Raccoon’ for the next couple of months – someone has very kindly volunteered to fill my shoes whilst I concentrate on getting better.

I’ve spent the week-end letting out all my dresses – fair to say, they are not exactly, ahem, the same shape and size as me, and its been a bit of a squeeze getting them into some of the party frocks, the final effect is slightly more Widow-Twanky-stuffed-chipolata than genuine Raccoon; but then they took to the four inch stilettos with alarming alacrity, a few wobbles and they were off and running in them, as though, suspiciously, very suspiciously, they had done it before….

I have been humbled and awed by all your messages of support. I knew you were out there, the porn stats told me so, and I hope you will all continue to contribute to the new Raccoon’s offerings in such magnificent numbers. There is something very daunting about writing for an audience that you can see is out there, but rarely say anything. You sit there wondering why? Did they like it so much they couldn’t think of anything to add? Did they dislike it so much they’ve gone off in disgust? Who are they?

Just say ‘Hi’ if you can think of nothing else, comments mean so much to a blogger. They let you know that your efforts are not in vain. That will be particularly so for the new Ms Raccoon, it is doubly hard taking over someone else’s blog with a completely different style to your own, to say nothing of the hard work involved in running two blogs at once, both with different systems and different levers.

So, put your teeth in Ms Smudd, smarten yourself up, you have hot competition.

Saul, if you could clean the ladies and the gents, I’m not at all sure which will be in use….

Give a big hand to the new Ms Raccoon. No, I’m not going to tell you who it is, you’ll have to figure that out for yourselves.

Nooooooo, not him, that would be too easy, besides, he wants to be an MP doesn’t he?

A bottle of Margaux to the first person who gets it right.