‘Chipmunk’s’ last stand.
Poor little Albion, the once mighty nation threatened by a chipmunk………
We should be indebted to the Daily Mail for alerting us to this danger; the nation is to be overrun, not by immigrants, not by swine flu, not by overwhleming debt, not by the hysterical laughter of our European neighbours, but by chipmunks!
They have already reached Paris! Zut Alors! Practically on our doorstep!
Some of them carry a fatal disease! Well, it can be fatal if not treated early enough.
They might sneak aboard a cross channel ferry…they might bite an assylum seeker who has already sneaked aboard a cross chanel ferry! If they do, and they turn out to be one of the ones that does carry this fatal disease, the assylum seeker might not get treated soon enough, (why not, if he’s not a British citizen, he won’t have to wait months willl he?)
Those that don’t, OK, the many that don’t, will just be little chipmunks that don’t carry a fatal disease – until they reach our shores…….where they will soon enough be infected by Lyme’s disease, which is endemic in the mice, voles, squirrels, blackbirds, pheasants, and seagull population of Great Britain.
The Daily Mail says the ’situation is critical’, heavens!, the ‘coastline is only 22 miles away at the nearest point’…….er, yes, it always has been, and Paris is still another 125 miles away.
Just as well Chipmunks can’t fly, that (non) story might have made the front page.
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1
July 23, 2009 at 11:37 -
We will fight them on the beaches….
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2
July 23, 2009 at 12:02 -
Beat me to it Saul. Very funny.
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3
July 23, 2009 at 13:01 -
Nuts…
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4
July 23, 2009 at 13:54 -
Did someone mention the silly season?
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5
July 23, 2009 at 14:08 -
You can buy them in pet shops here in Spain, they’re rapid little buggers. Our local pet shop sells, dogs, cats, parrots, chipmunks, reptiles (all sorts), ferrets, ducks, chickens, fish, budgies, wabbits, tortoises and all manner of arachnids and other insectoids… all in cages or fishtanks.
The RSPCA would have a fit!!!!
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6
July 23, 2009 at 14:10 -
What President Sarkozy has called the Battle of France is over. I expect that the Battle of Britain is about to begin. Upon this battle depends the survival of Red Squirrel civilization. Upon it depends our own British life, and the long continuity of our institutions and our Empire. The whole fury and might of the enemy must very soon be turned on us. Alvin and the Chipmunks know that they will have to break us in this Island or lose the war. If we can stand up to him, all Europe may be freed and the life of the world may move forward into broad, sunlit uplands. But if we fail, then the whole world, including the United States, including all that we have known and cared for, will sink into the abyss of a new Dark Age made more sinister, and perhaps more protracted, by the lights of perverted science. Let us therefore brace ourselves to our duties, and so bear ourselves, that if the British Empire and its Commonwealth last for a thousand years, men will still say, “This was their finest hour.”
Address to the First Light Infantry and Dragoon Guards, Red Squirrel Regiment.
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7
July 23, 2009 at 14:25
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8
July 23, 2009 at 14:45 -
In the long history of the world, only a few generations have been granted the role of defending freedom in its hour of maximum danger. I do not shank from this responsibility – I welcome it. I do not believe that any of us would exchange places with any other people or any other generation. The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this endeavour will light our country and all who serve it — and the glow from that fire can truly light the world.
And so, my fellow Red Squirrels: ask not what your country can do for you – ask what you can do for your country.
Ich Bin Ein Squirrel
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9
July 23, 2009 at 14:57 -
Get the pinks, the hounds and the horses ready – forget Ferdy, let’s get Chip ‘n’ Dale.
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10
July 23, 2009 at 15:00
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11
July 23, 2009 at 15:04 -
I’ve got a chipmunk. I call it Hazel.
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12
July 23, 2009 at 15:55 -
I’ve got a two-cat Ronnie&Reggiement if they’d be any good?
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13
July 23, 2009 at 15:56 -
How is it in charge of the First Light Infantry and Dragoon Guards, Red Squirrel Regiment, Saul? Not too Tufty at the top?
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14
July 23, 2009 at 16:03
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15
July 23, 2009 at 16:08 -
Just got back! Yipppppppeeeeeeeee!! You poor things – a one-woman hippo-hit-squad bashing away at the keyboard at all hours of the day and night; the irresistible combination of girth and enthusiasm…..
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16
July 24, 2009 at 00:29 -
I’m the Kernel in Chief Gloria
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17
July 24, 2009 at 09:37 -
Crackin’ reply, Kernel.
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18
July 24, 2009 at 09:54
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19
July 24, 2009 at 10:08 -
How’s those boots Ms Raccoon?
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20
July 24, 2009 at 10:11 -
Squirrels left the Chipmunks shell shocked.
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21
July 24, 2009 at 10:13 -
“Anything Pecan do, I can do bedder, ….”
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22
July 24, 2009 at 10:17 -
Morning Gloria, give me a bit of slack.
CASHEW!!! Bloody flu.
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23
July 24, 2009 at 10:29 -
Mornin’ Saul. Cover yer marf, yer ornery crittur!
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24
July 24, 2009 at 11:30 -
Sorry I’m a bit Hoarse and Chesty.
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25
July 24, 2009 at 16:19 -
Head and shoulders above the rest of us mere mortals, Saul; no wonder you have to stoop to conker.
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