I adore the hilariously jingoistic tone of the Express headline.

“UK faces massive bill to bail out Europe’s collapsing economies.”

Perfect, it is a very close contender for the famous ‘Surrey man misses death trap plane, faces long wait for transport home – 346 dead.’

“BRITAIN could have to foot part of a £425billion bill following Greece’s economic collapse, it emerged last night.”

No it didn’t, it emerged some months ago.

What a wily little creature Gordon Brown is. Last March he was strutting the world stage as host of the G20 conference and promising to inject a billion pounds of British tax payers’ money into the IMF fund. The European Union alone has pledged more than £50 billion pounds to the IMF, by May 2009 it was expected that the fund would eventually total in excess of £600 Billion.

In PMQs he was repeatedly pressed by David Cameron to give an assurance that British Taxpayers would not be expected to bail out the Greek government or any other country in the Euro zone.

Three times he was asked the question; three times he refused to give a straight answer, mumbling that any bail out in the Euro zone would come from an ‘International’ alliance.

The International alliance, of course, is the IMF – into which British tax payers have already injected billions of pounds to be used in the event of a crisis such as the situation in Greece.

Alistair Darling in October 2009:

“We are one of the largest donors to the IMF.”

Britain may not be in the Euro zone, but they will be making one of the largest contributions to bailing out the Euro-zone.

The Express continues in ostrich mode:

“Both Portugal and Spain have seen their debt downgraded by ratings agencies and could become targets for bailouts unless they tackle their deficits swiftly.”

Without even hinting at the fact that whilst the official credit rating for the UK is still Triple AAA – and likely to remain so until after the election – the market has already marked us down to –aa, and is not likely to rate us any higher until we take stringent action to reduce our deficit.

The IMF hasn’t knocked on our door yet, but they are parked over the road, keeping a watchful eye on the comings and goings. We too will be told that we have to cut salary and pension increases for civil servants, and make savage savings in other directions.

We needn’t look to America to solve our global problem as Gord keeps referring to it. They have a far more serious problem to attend to. Pakistan.

Pakistan has only one month’s worth of payments left in the coffers. Their credit rating is CCC+ – barely above junk bond status, which means that only those with the greatest reason to fear an economic collapse are likely to, not so much lend, as make an outright gift, of the money required to feed and warm the population. America will not want China or Russia bailing out Pakistan, so will dig deep into its pockets to ensure that they can afford to keep their 150,000 troops on the Afghan border.

Do you really think they will find money for the UK too? We are not a threat to them.

This is truly the election that nobody wants to win – least of all Gordon; he would far rather be comfortably ensconced in the Leader of the Opposition’s seat, bobbing up and down at Question Time, criticising, reeling out his tractor stats, and telling everyone how he could have ruled the world if only we had voted for him.

UNITE gave Labour £11,000,000 to put in its coffers. Have you seen any sign of that money being spent on this election?

For the first time in history, with a leader with the charisma of an embalmed walrus, they agree to a televised debate? A few posters deriding the Conservatives, and nothing of their own alleged successes. They have fought the entire election as though they were already in opposition – nowt said about their own policies, but bucket loads of criticism regarding the other two parties, storing up a Euro mountain of ‘told you so’ for the future.

Nah, they never wanted to win this one. They know perfectly well what is coming our way. All three contenders. Mervyn King told us so.

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Antisthenes
May 3, 2010 at 11:17

It never occurred to me that Labour did not want to win this election, I am still skeptical that they do not. However I have long thought and advocated that this was an election that the Conservatives would be foolish to win. By the same measure you have used to come to the conclusion that Labour do not want to win you could say very much the same of the Conservative campaign it has been very lack luster and they appear to be pulling their punches. Conversely it can be said that it is a stitch up and the Conservatives and Labour have agreed between themselves to drop the hot potato into Clegg’s lap. After all the Lib-Dem’s are a thorn in both their sides. I think too much conspiracy theory for one day!

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SadButMadLad
May 3, 2010 at 11:27

My money is on Labour going bankrupt after the election, especially if they come in third in the popular vote. The

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Jabba the Cat
May 3, 2010 at 11:46

My immediate thought on first seeing this picture was of Brown and Clegg congratulating Cameron on winning the election…

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Indianhat
May 3, 2010 at 11:47

I agree with you Anna, they never wanted to win this one. Its fairly obvious they have been dropping excrement on their (our) own doorstep for years and know what price will have to be paid by whoever cleans it up, but it won’t be them, factor in the McCarthy twit thing, Straws little gaff (hah) and bigot calling, and you have a perfect recipe for disaffecting the voters.
They not only never wanted it, they knew they wouldn’t get it except on the back of a coalition with someone stupid enough to be the recipient of all the trouble to come…no one we know surely?

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Saul
May 3, 2010 at 12:49

It’s a bit like three bald blokes fighting over a comb.

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Subrosa
May 3, 2010 at 13:04

Brown has given up. You can tell from his body language. Rumour has it (around here) that he will pack in politics if he loses. He may immediately resign his seat too. Plenty of room for his on the board of some of these carbon credit companies he’s pumped our money into I’m sure.

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