A floundering leader I… – The Anna Raccoon Archives

by Anna Raccoon on August 14, 2016

(Corby-Poo:)
A floundering leader I —

A thing of i-sol-ation,

Of ballots, songs and banners,

And dreary Labour lies!

My manifesto’s long,

Through every passion ranging,

And to your votes a changing

I tune my supple song!

Are you in sentimental mood?

I’ll sigh with you,

Oh, sorrow, sorrow!

On Blairites presence do you brood?

I’ll do so, too —

Oh, sorrow, sorrow!

I’ll charm your willing ears

With songs of Labour fears,

While sympathetic tears

My cheeks bedew —

Oh, sorrow, sorrow!

But if Trotsky sentiment is wanted,

I’ve Trotsky ballads cut and dried;

For where’er our Momentum banner may be planted,

All other Labour banners are defiled!

Our new members, in serried ranks assembled,

Never Tory — or they conceal it if they are —

And I shouldn’t be surprised if Judges trembled

Before the mighty troops of £3 In-fil-trators!

(Chorus:)

We shouldn’t be surprised if Judges trembled,

Trembled with alarm

Before the mighty troops,

The troops of £3 in-fil-trators!

With the usual apologies to Mssrs. Gilbert and Sullivan.

Feel free to add a verse or two.

{ 16 comments… read them below or add one }

Ajay August 14, 2016 at 10:10 am

Presumably sung to the tune of A Wandering Minstrel… I won’t get this out of my head today as I weed the garden

Anna Raccoon August 14, 2016 at 10:33 am

Good – maybe I’ve managed to pass the earworm onto someone else!

I made the mistake of recording the Mikado the other night and it’s been running riot in my head ever since.

Ajay August 14, 2016 at 2:09 pm: My Dad once performed in it and the songs are addictive but it always cheers me up thinking of him. He had this amazing Kimono for the production that we dressed up in for years. Thanks for revoking these memories

Reply

Owen August 14, 2016 at 10:11 am

A worthy successor to Peter Lilley.

Mudplugger August 14, 2016 at 4:57 pm

And for your next G&S libretto challenge…..

“I am the very model of a modern Marxist man, I am.”

Pericles Xanthippou August 14, 2016 at 7:11 pm

My object all sublime
I shall achieve in time
To prove the war in Iraq a crime
The war in Iraq a crime;

Till Blairites all repent
And willingly represent
A common ruddy constituent
A ruddy constituent.

(Well, I thought I was doing quite well to meet W.S.G. with parechesis. I trust all fellow imbibers are familiar with the meaning of ‘ruddy’.)

ΠΞ

tdf August 14, 2016 at 9:00 pm

A floundering leader? Hardly.

http://www.thejournal.ie/labour-members-can-vote-2916635-Aug2016/

Jimbob McGinty August 14, 2016 at 11:37 pm

Tom Lehrer’s ‘The Elements’ is ne plus ultra

http://youtu.be/DYW50F42ss8

The Blocked Dwarf August 14, 2016 at 11:48 pm

Can’t think up weak puns for a G&S song but here’s the start of something to the tune of the ‘Bold Gendarmes’ :

Oh we are the readers Guardian
and must show that we CARE
the life female do we cherish
always believing HER.

…now I just need to find something obscene to rhyme with ‘Gendarmes’

Mudplugger August 15, 2016 at 8:45 am: How about Sooty “…..doing a reach-around with his wand-arms” ?

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tdf August 14, 2016 at 11:59 pm

Anyone want to attempt a similar limerick for Teresa May?

I wonder if her poll approval ratings will hold up when and if it dawns on the great British voting public that she has set up a totally unworkable inquiry.

Then again, who knows, they don’t call her Teflon Teresa for nothing.

Now that I think of it, Anna, how about a limerick writing competition in honour of Teflon Tom Watson?

Alone among the ‘Gang of 7’ MP’s, the trajectory of his career seems to have sky-rocketed since 2014. Granted, he was hardly an obscure MP even back then, being already well-known due to his campaigning against phone-hacking & the Murdoch group, but now he is the deputy leader of what is still the second largest political party in the UK, notwithstanding its current troubles.

Mr Ecks August 15, 2016 at 5:45 pm: Socialism has murdered 150 million human beings–so far–and ruined the lives of hundreds of millions more.

Make up a limerick about that.

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tdf August 15, 2016 at 5:49 pm

^ I think that when we put any ‘-ism’ above human beings, then we are in trouble. As a rule, I don’t trust concepts ending in ‘ism’.

windsock August 15, 2016 at 6:24 pm: Isn’t that called scepticism?

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Greg Tingey August 23, 2016 at 9:12 am

All the people are going on about “A new kind of politics” re Corby ( err Corbyn)
Actually, it’s a mix of two ( possibly three) very old politics.
Going backwards in time:
1: A reversion to approx 1975 – which led, in revulsion to something almost as bad, the madwoman from Grantham
2 Look up G Lansbury – who was removed from Labour’s leadership approx 1935, because we wanted disarmament & that nice Mr Hitler was not any problem.
3: K Marx, who was a brilliant economic analyst & fuck-awful predictor. Every single prediction made by KM (as far as I can see) has been wrong, but of course the believers (Remember that Marxism/communism is a classic religion) refuse to acknowledege this

Mobfiz October 5, 2016 at 8:55 pm: You’re right Greg, it is going back in time. But isn’t this backward step labelled progressive ? Or hang on, am I confused ? Perhaps it’s Theresa May who is the real progressive. Anna’s discourse on what it really means to be a progressive today would be interesting.

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