Most things that one eats supposedly shorten your lifespan, but eating nothing at all doesn’t seem to lengthen it!

If one eats things in moderation, then the harm (if there is any) is reduced. I’ve never been able to reconcile the various utterances of the health crowd, for example a fat nurse lecturing me on my weight, cholesterol and blood sugar content, while the Doctor was prescribing something that increases all three! If we then move to the health food crowd, they say that things like hamburgers have little food value, whereas it is blindingly obvious that they contain a mix of fats, proteins, carbohydrates – and through the lettuce, onion and tomato a set of raw vegetables – so they tick all the boxes! One a month can do no harm whatsoever, but two or more a day is quite definitely a bad eating habit, the problem being not lack of nutrients but excess.

Sure, the blasted things probably include all sorts of additives, but the evidence from population statistics is that they lengthen life.

If you want to be put off salmon forever, visit Norway, where it will be served at least 3 times a day: boiled, smoked, baked, grilled, barbecued, pickled, in mayonnaise, sliced, cubed, on bread, on toast, on yet more salmon …. Oh God, after three weeks there I couldn’t bring myself to eat the stuff for 10 years.

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The landlady knows her way around victuals and law (and much else besides), but shows a rooky’s ignorance of salmon that must be improved before dastardly sellers take advantage of her good nature. So let’s start at the beginning, Pacific or Atlantic? there are big differences in taste, then Sockeye, Chinook, Coho, Pink, Spring? I am going to suggest Pacific Salmon probably what Europeans call “red” salmon preferably Sockeye or Coho though the others with the exception of the pinks are acceptable. Why?

The Seattle study cited is pretty much nonsense, the juvenile salmon they studied, nobody is going to bother to catch or eat. The juveniles typically only spend +-20 % of the life in these sheltered waters whence they leave to live in the ocean and mature. Would they have background contaminants at maturity? I don’t know, maybe, but certainly at a very lesser degree purely on the basis of weight gain. No matter what I suggest that Pacific salmon would be far less exposed to contaminants and radiation than North Sea or Irish Sea Salmon, even allowing that the Fukushima debacle has contaminated the Pacific.

Which may or may not be interesting, but the question was-‘has anybody got details of a salmon fisherman working in an area where the locals aren’t off their head with Cocaine, anti-depressants, and probably Viagra and passing it on to the salmon – who can arrange a fast postal service via a ‘hot smoker’?” Yes I do, but I doubt that shipping “fresh” salmon from British Columbia, a third of the way across the world in small quantities is going to be affordable.

That leads me to this lady: http://www.britishcolumbia.ca/export/events/seafood-expo-global-1/

who seems to be co-ordinating our local fishing industry to display at “seafood expo” in Europe and would no doubt have some useful contacts of companies already exporting into Europe who would no doubt be delighted to reveal their local vendors. As a fallback I can recommend this company, https://twitter.com/albionfisheries

Good luck on your fishing expedition landlady, if you need further help you no doubt have my email.

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