Ah, Jeremy ‘I’m too sexy for my vest’ Corbyn; the political gift for whom everyday is Christmas Day. It has made the dog days of August so much more enjoyable watching the Labour party tremble lest one of their ‘vulnerable’ voters catches sight of his priapic left-wing credentials.
‘For God’s sake, zip him up, make him put it away’ cry the maiden aunts, Harriet, Yvette and Liz. ‘I told you we should have banned the Internet, there are young voters watching him online in full colour; they’re learning things they should never be aware of’.
Great Uncles Mandelson and Hain are gurgling with delight – for years they have been closely chaperoned at public events for fear the voters would learn things they shouldn’t, too raw for their tender ears – now Grandpa Corbyn has bounded up on stage, taken over the karaoke microphone, unzipped his sheeple clothing and blasted out that well known rallying call ‘Wanna be in my gang, my gang’. Fellow MP John Mann was so outraged by this Glittering performance he threatened to pursue Corbyn ‘on child abuse‘ for as long as I have breathe’. (sic)
Corbyn, or JC, as he is known in messianic circles, has set the Labour party alight, something you may think was long overdue. At last they are agreed on something – voters are suspect creatures, and should be analysed, identified, and not allowed to vote unless they agree to vote for the right person. Normally these nanny-electoral types turn their vitriolic ire on those perverts who vote Tory, but this time it is Tories voting true red Labour that has got to them.
‘Tory-scum – stop voting Labour’ the banners scream. ‘We don’t want to have a leader who cosies up to vile creatures like the duly elected member for Louth in Ireland, we want the sort of leader who will sign oil deals with murderous dictators’ (and the duly elected member for Louth before he went all respectable).
Despite the kiss of death for any leadership candidate being delivered by Russell Brand, ‘Our Jezza’ is still stormin’ ahead. Even Rupert Murdoch is banging what’s left of his gongs for him.
Corbyn increasingly likely Labor winner. Seems only candidate who believes anything, right or wrong.
— Rupert Murdoch (@rupertmurdoch) August 20, 2015
The Daily Mailograph was running a two page article today detailing all the disasters that would befall this septic isle in the 1st 1,000 days of ‘Corbyn-rule’ – calm down dears, its only a commercial. Nobody is going to let him rule the country, not even Labour – but letting him rule the Labour party? That’s different, that’s more in line of a public service.
Methinks even the BBC are preparing for the Corbyn-era by putting their weather forecasts up for grabs. No longer the Met Office – anyone want to take bets on the contract being ‘fairly and transparently’ handed to Weather Action? Weather Action is strongly opposed to the idea of global warming being manmade.
“… CO2 has never driven, does not drive and never will drive weather or climate. Global warming is over and it never was anything to do with CO2. CO2 is still rising but the world is now cooling and will continue to do so.”
That’s Jeremy’s brother, Piers Corbyn speaking – Weather Action is his company.
Of course, the Labour party does have a history of electing the wrong brother….just saying…
I hope Corbyn wins, because politics and particularly the moribund Labour party need to be galvanised into action. I’ve watched them descend into a pack of spoilt children desperately trying to portray the Tories as ‘VIP paedophiles’ – their main thrust of why they should be back in power. They have become the party of pathetic whingers.
Will he destroy the present Labour party? One can only hope so – their toxic legacy of the past 13 years deserves to be wiped from the face of the nation – Iraq, the banking fiasco, mass immigration, a housing price bubble, an educational system in chaos, and a police force engaged in investigating 30 year old complaints from repentant rent boys, but with no time to protect elderly widows who have been burgled.
Will he reform a new Labour party round him? One can only hope so – we need a strong opposition in our adversarial political system. I don’t believe for one moment that Corbyn could win the next general election – nor could any of the other three candidates. However, the other three are sufficiently ‘Tory-light’ that Cameron may wrongly believe that he has to absorb some of the careerist circus of feminist Fabian policies in order to appease them. At least with Corbyn, Cameron can see him coming from a mile off. So can the British public.