The Australia I remember of 40 years ago was a land of decidedly alpha-males. Beautifully tanned and muscle rippled alpha-males as it happens, most pleasing to the young woman’s eye. The skanky, lanky, English specimen I had brought with me didn’t bear comparison, but in the end – once I had discovered that I couldn’t afford a house in Paddington and everything else appeared to have a corrugated iron roof – I erred on the side of practicality, and returned to England with skanky in tow. He didn’t last in England.

I was impressed with the way Australia was organised. A sensible immigration policy – ‘do we need your skills and will you fit in with our lifestyle’ were the priorities; a neat division between those – the men – best suited to grubbing gold out of the baking rock, and those – the women – best suited to rearing the children. God had blessed them with a lid over the country and a most efficient patio heater; there was space for everyone, and some thoughtful person had installed coin operated barbecues on the beaches so you didn’t need to lug your own down there.

I thought it was an excellent place, corrugated roofs notwithstanding, and positively the last place on earth where the fledgling political correctness then appearing in the US and the UK would take hold.

Oi! Bruce! What happened? It certainly wouldn’t have been the alpha-males that chose to change the place, and the women all knew their place in the kitchen, so how could it have occurred?

I was aware that Australia had caught the political correctness bug; the plain packs of cigarettes, the censored Internet, but I hadn’t realised that Bruce had been gelded – with a  vengeance. Take your eye off the ball and someone will whip them off. Perhaps we should nickname him Brucette in future.

Not just the alpha-male, but any male, is officially a potential danger to women and children. We have a semblance of the same in the UK, the CRB checks for the window cleaner who must walk through the school corridors to go about his daily business; the banning of photographs of the school sack race in case you go home and salivate over a picture of someone else’s nine-year old encased in hessian; the swimming instructor who cannot enter the water whilst teaching the Kids to swim. We haven’t yet entered the realm of assuming that sitting next to a child could traumatise them for life.

Australia has.

It is now official Quantas policy that unaccompanied males cannot sit next to a child on their internal flights. God knows what you could get up to in full view of the other passengers between Sydney Airport and Perth. Buses and trains cannot be far behind in following this policy – then what? You cannot queue behind a child in your local supermarket? Only gelded fireman can go into the flaming building to rescue that child – God knows what a real man could get up to unseen in that smoke filled environment as you hold your breath praying for your child’s life. A male surgeon in the operating theatre – and there is your child unconscious in front of him? Why your dear little one will be scarred for life as a potential future child abuser before the anesthetic has worn off!

There is only one logical solution to the progress of this policy, and that is to reduce all males to a test tube in the fridge. You’re laughing? I would have fallen off my chair 40 years ago if anyone had told me that Australian males would meekly accept that they have ’potential kiddy fiddler’ tattooed on their foreheads.

The snake hipped and defiantly fey Quantas cabin stewards of old, famed throughout Thailand for their stop over high jinks with small boys, have been replaced by sturdy sensible women, patrolling the aisles of Qauntas flights, requesting any lone male move from the vicinity of an innocent child. And, meekly, doth he move, albeit cringing with embarrassment. Brucette indeed.

I am puzzled that Australia should now be filled with unaccompanied children being posted from one end of the country to the other – has this become such an attraction that they have pedophiles buying airline tickets on the off chance that they might be seated next to one of them for a brief few minutes before they are spotted? It is not just Quantas either, a little research tells me that this is merely the latest incident, both Virgin and Air New Zealand have the same policy. In fact Boris Johnson was once asked to move by British Airways, until his children piped up and pointed out that he was their Father and thus had unfettered access to them outside of flight times!

It has explained why I so loath flying these days; I always seemed to get seated next to some screaming squabbling brat belonging to someone else. Now I know why. It’s my skirt. In future I shall adopt a fake moustache, and leer at said child – it’s the only way to fly.

When are men going to stand up to this Vile Lie Club?

The Filthy
Engineer August 31, 2012 at 13:47

Personally as a parent, if I was sending one of my brood off alone on an
aircraft, I would welcome the child sitting next to a hulking alpha male. In
the event of an accident, there’s a good chance the child would survive with
the help of the man. How many small children would have the strength and
knowledge to open an “overwing” exit?

john malpas August 22, 2012 at 00:41

Part of the trouble is if you vote ALP to get wage justice you get all
sorts of other fellow travellera as well.

Thor2Hammer August 21, 2012 at 18:42

That “Boris link” given by Anna is well worth a full read – – – He expands
the ‘assumption’ that he was a paedophile to a glorious rant about the
‘female-isation’ of schools
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/comment/personal-view/3634055/Come-off-it-folks-how-many-paedophiles-can-there-be.html

As to the comment about ‘suddenly becoming a pervert’- yes, there ARE
circumstances where this can happen OK – or where silly people can think it
does. John and Jane were both members of a ‘Uniformed Youth Organisation’ near
where I live – and it was common knowledge that they had ‘been an item’ since
about 14yo. . Leaders knew – the other kids knew – no-one seemed concerned.
Until they suddenly realised – Shock! -HORROR! – John held a ‘position of
Authority’ – ( he had a ‘rank’, helped with training &c.) and would soon
be EIGHTEEN. He was told to leave (but not say why) until Jane’s’ birthday –
when normal activities could safely resume.

Peter MacFarlane
August 21, 2012 at 16:25

“It is now official Quantas policy that unaccompanied males cannot sit next
to a child on their internal flights”

It’s been British Airways official policy for several years.

They don’t publicise it, but they rig the seating algorithms to make sure
of it, and if that doesn’t work they DO ask you to move. Always.

Sickening.

gladiolys August 21, 2012 at 07:49

a): should not the parents who encourage unsuitably young children to
travel alone be the ones who face censure? It is they who will sue for damages
for airline negligence should their child become “groomed” on a flight, when
it is they who have declined to accept responsibility for looking after their
own child. Of course, the airline is quite happy to accept the airfare for the
lone child, so they do have some responsibility if they are going to be aware
they are transporting minors. – maybe they should insist they are accompanied
by an appropriate adult?

b) Ed Butt and Bulaman: you may think you’re being funny, but equating gays
(“queers” and “poofters”} with child abuse is pathetic.

Anna
Raccoon August 21, 2012 at 08:21

Agreed gladiolys, but I find equating ‘lone male’ with potential child
abuse just as offensive.

gladiolys
August 21, 2012 at 09:05

Anna, we agree.

john malpas August 21, 2012 at 02:19

Is this all not part of cultural marxism?

Woman on a
Raft August 21, 2012 at 00:45

It certainly wouldn’t have been the alpha-males that chose to change the
place

No? In 1972 the large-scale child abuse scandals in Australia were just
emerging. Your alpha males were quite likely to have been victims, depending
on where they were brought up. It may be they didn’t at that point fancy
discussing what had happened with you.

Over the intervening years they have been as shocked as many good Catholics
to discover that they were not the only ones, the abuse was widespread, and
that authorities when they were told about it took the opportunity to cover up
and discredit them. Like the ghastly Margaret Hodge – who should have been out
on her jacksi for her handling and remarks about childcare in Islington – the
reaction can be characterized as “Big Jock Knew” and that goes right the way
up to the pope.

Grandparents now, the victims and their friends may perhaps over-react but
that’s an unfortunate legacy of betrayal. It will take a generation for them
to feel secure again. A very good start has been made; Rudd made an official
apology which had the effect of clearly establishing that these things
happened and they should not have. Prosecutions continue, we’ll see what
happens in court.
http://www.abc.net.au/news/2012-05-22/sex-abuse-charges-for-hostel-worker/4025974

Tom M August 20, 2012 at 21:48

Would they not be better off ensuring that children are seated next to
total strangers? Isn’t the vast majority of child abuse carried out by family
members or friends of the family.

Lerxst August 20, 2012 at 21:31

Why would we want to fight this particular rule? As you give away with your
sudden desire to acquire facial hair, it’s the perfect excuse to never have to
set next to someone else’s annoying little brat ever again.

Ed Butt August 20,
2012 at 20:05

Strewth Shiela, I told ‘em it was a mistake letting the poofters in.

Come back Barry McKenzie, all is forgiven

Ian T

Bulaman August 20, 2012 at 19:09

Q (ueers) A (nd) N (ymphomaniacs) T (rained) A (s) S (tewards)

Brian August 20,
2012 at 18:32

I googled this paper by Michelle Elliott of Kidscape. Perhaps children
should travel in the cargo hold.

Ed P August 20, 2012 at 18:27

At what age does a boy suddenly switch into an adult and therefore becomes
a potential child-molester?

Does it happen overnight on his 16th or 18th birthday? (And obviously it
never ever happens to girls as they turn into women.)

This bullshit should be resisted by everyone.

Andrew Duffin
August 21, 2012 at 16:30

Ed, it happens at eighteen.

My youngest son suddenly had to have an “enhanced disclosure” done when
he reached that age, because he is a supervisor in a restaurant and some of
the people who work for him are under 18, ie “children”.

They are his own school friends.

DKendall August 20, 2012 at 17:12

Are there actually any known cases of men molesting random children they’ve
been seated near on flights?

Feminists have been quick to mock and attack men who’ve complained about
this; accusing them of being selfish privileged MRA scumbags who’d rather see
innocent children abused than suffer a minor inconvenience. Of course that
only makes any kind of sense if there’s a genuine threat that children need to
be protected from.

Woman on a
Raft August 21, 2012 at 01:08

Depends on if you’d been sat next to the charmer Vernon Quaintance who
spent 30 years specializing in getting children to talk about – and
preferably show him – their willies for his delight and delectation.
However, as a general MO, the average child abuser will pick someone they
know rather than a stranger who might react unpredictably and with whom the
cabin staff might tend to side. A short haul flight is not enough, not worth
the risk, but a long haul flight gives long enough to establish some kind of
relationship. The danger tends not to be the flight; the prize is the
child’s numbers and the excuse to contact them later having established that
it is alright to talk to them.

GildasTheMonk
August 20, 2012 at 15:47

Quite. What nonsense. Echoing a good piece in the Sunday Times yesterday in
which the author (a woman, a well known author on a summer school course on
meditation) was not allowed in the music block to play the piano; there could
be some children in there and she had not had her Criminal Record (whatever it
is) check.
We now live in a world which is paranoid about letting adults
near children, unless those adults are weird hoodie wearing psycho leftie
sandal wearing weird beard (and that is just teh women) social workers.
I
heard a nice story on the radio this week. A man was on the underground near
the Olympics. A woman was sitting near by on the tune with a boy who had some
acne or some such on his face, and the child kept scratching. The mother was
tryng to destract the boy and telling him not to scratch. So the man stepped
over offered his help and the woman gave him the full on “stranger danger”
glare. “Well,” says then man to the boy, reaching no doubt menacingly into his
trousers “I just wondered if you had seen one of THESE before!”
HO HO
HO!
Whereupon the man, British Olympic Double Trap Gold Medal Winner Peter
Wilson, produced his Gold Medal, to the astonishment and joy of the little
boy.
No doubt his case comes up next week.

gladiolys August 20, 2012 at 15:19

Anna: it’s not just Australia. It’s not just Qantas:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/travelnews/7852146/BA-made-businessman-feel-like-child-molester.html

Lew August 20, 2012 at 12:29

The transformation happened about the same time common bloody sense was
declared a heinous crime.

Given half a sporting chance every real bloke i know would slit the throat
of any kiddie fiddler without a moments hesitation and wouldn’t waste a second
looking back.

Those same proper blokes enjoy looking at women, though thats almost no
longer acceptable cos dungaree wearing vegetarians who the blokes didn’t look
at got the ‘ump and declared it non PC…thank the good Lord for all you lovely
ladies who sensibly ignore such rubbish, you make the world go round, and us
normal geezers love you for it, so continue dressing to please please.

I don’t know how to cure it, not so long ago my BiL, a more proper geezer
you couldn’t find, picked up and handed back something a little ‘un had
dropped from its pushchair whilst being driven round Tesco by something
masquerading loosely as a mother…..this apparent mother took one look at my
BiL and hissed ”Pervert” at him…now put yerself in his shoes for a moment, how
the bloody hell do you respond to that, no smoke without fire?, the worlds
gone bloody mad…if only my good lady had been there she’d have wiped the floor
with the idiot, half wit mother does not know how lucky she is.

We’ve walked straight into the lunatic asylum and i’m buggered if i can see
a way out, the only good thing is that i usually find other peoples sprogs the
most vile detestable spoilt brats imaginable, so anything that keeps me away
from the sods can’t be all bad…:)

TTFN, Lew.

Budvar August 20, 2012 at 12:09

All’s not a total loss, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1EY7lYRneHc says it all
really.

Elena ‘andcart
August 21, 2012 at 18:13

That Video was really funny, and made I larf.
As it happens, my
ghastly stepmother nearly dragged us all off to Australia in the early
1950s. No doubt she would have farmed me out to some Paedophile Sheep Farmer
because I had become quite adept at house work by then, since she never did
any house work. But Daddy got shirty about it, probably because he was too
used to calling everyone, “Mate”, and couldn’t cope with Cobber. I never
quite forgave him for that.
Sheesh, I could be married to a genuine,
Neville Shute Sheep Farmer with loads a money and loads a horses. Not to
forget the sheep. I quite like sheep.

Bruce August 20, 2012 at 12:00

In answer to the question at the end of a great observation. “when the
women give us men our balls bacK”

Budvar August 20, 2012 at 11:14

You do realise that Quantas airlines don’t actually have any planes, pilots
or steward/esses?
Quantas is basically a company set up to cash cheques
sent in by people who can’t spell “Qantas”…

Anna
Raccoon August 20, 2012 at 11:39

A beautiful put down – congratulations. I am duly chastened!

Joe Public
August 20, 2012 at 13:09

‘Cos it’s an acronym.

Queensland And Northern Territories Air Service.

Anna
Raccoon August 20, 2012 at
13:55

Yeah, I know that now, I’m thick!

JimS August 20, 2012 at 10:16

I wish Air UK had had this policy back in the ’70s – flying into
Leeds-Bradford in the back of an F-27 with a lone youngster with extreme
travel sickness was not pleasant!

Around the same time I remember walking along the open footpath, across
some parkland near Dunfermline, when a child, on a swing a hundred feet away,
being pushed by its mother, started screaming “Mum, a man, a man!”. That
child, if she survived the shock, could well be a grandmother now so the fear
is well entrenched now into society. ‘Stranger Danger’ has got to be the best
smokescreen concocted to cover child abuse ever invented.