I was in our local bank today and there was a queue. Being lunchtime, and in the time honoured custom of British service standards, all the tills were closed bar one.
Being lunchtime, and in the time honoured way of British shopkeepers, this is the best time to cash up the forty two bags of farthings that they want to deposit.
I don’t do queues, it is a waste of my allotted time on earth, so I decided to come back later after a coffee etc. etc.
On my return, the queue had abated to one person and his wife with a collection of Tesco shopping bags, but still no more staff.
Then bundles of twenties started tumbling out of the plastic Tesco bags, some £140,000. The couple started chatting, they had just cashed in their ISAs and were emigrating to Australia on Sunday. They were ‘cashing in their chips’ in England for a new life, and having the chips sent to pastures new.
The queue started to get longer and longer, at which point the putative emigrant looked round and saw the queue.
At the top of his voice he then said: –
“Ladies and Gentlemen, I can only apologise for causing this queue, but we are off, leaving England and I hope the last queue I ever have to stand in. I have been an electrical contractor for thirty years, employed twenty staff all of whom I have recently made redundant because I am sick and tired of working for the Government and with the whining and complaining of the work-shy and feckless. Give me two minutes and I will be gone, before Clegg, Cameron and Miliband steal this nest egg as well”.
I was amazed! People started saying, “you carry on”, “I wish I was going with you”, “I don’t blame you”, “every thing is going to the dogs”, etc.
As he left , he and his wife got a round of applause.
True life drama !