Lazy Education In Norwich
Or, if you prefer, ‘Gotty’s Piss Boiler of the Week’.
It appears that Norwich County Council have the perfect solution to help bone idle teenage students achieve educational greatness, and deliver outstanding results, in the ever competitive arena of university places and/or full time employment.
The City Academy Norwich, or CAN as it’s now become known.
So what the fuck will be going on in this CAN that’s set to cost more than 24 million quid to implement? More hard graft? Longer hours? Improved discipline? Better teachers?
Nope.
They’re going to give the lazy little bastards even more lie-ins and turn the classroom (oh, sorry that should be ‘learning spaces’) into a “well motivated child’s bedroom” by chucking out the traditional school desks and chairs and kitting them out with bean bags, round tables and sofas. (No mention of half eaten bits of toast, dirty underwear, shit loads of make up or soiled tissues – as yet)
And if that wasn’t enough, they’re not even going to bother teaching the little scrotes anymore either. Staff will ‘delivering the lessons’ with a ‘project based approach to learning’ with the aid of ‘learning spaces’ that have flexible walls (what. the. fuck.) and a giant 30ft interactive screen that students, staff and parents will use to access the internet and check on timetables and lessons online gaming forums.
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| click on image to read more – if your blood pressure can take it |
I don’t know about anyone else but my piss has all but boiled dry, after reading that, and there are definite forehead imprints appearing on my desk as I finish conveying it in this post.
Twenty four fucking million quid! For what?
Give me fucking strength.
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1
September 19, 2010 at 14:36 -
Clever photoshopping … you’re making that up, aren’t you?
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2
September 19, 2010 at 15:30 -
Unfortunately not and this isn’t the first of these they’ve splashed out on in Norwich either. This other one opened recently at a cost of 20 million!! Have they got money to burn over there? Hmm, be interesting to know how much, for instance, their police farce budget is being cut by. Bet it’s less than the total combined cost of £44 million, for these two academies
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3
September 19, 2010 at 15:35 -
^^^ Have no idea what I did wrong there
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4
September 19, 2010 at 17:30 -
Put < infront of href, and after This one etc. Try this:
This other one opened recently at a cost of 20 million!! Have they got money to burn over there? -
7
September 20, 2010 at 09:32
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8
September 19, 2010 at 14:43 -
Quick perusal of The Sunday Times News Review section this morning. What turns a failing “sink” school into a successful one with children from poor backgrounds achieving high grades and the ambition and wherewithal to get to university – the mainspring of social mobility.
Any guesses? Well, in true Nu Lab dumbed down grade style let’s use multiple choice.Is it:
A: lots of new building and shiny new computers?
B: A plentiful supply of Ritalin and a highly developed Stress Counselling Department?
C: Strict no nonsense discipline, an emphasis on hard work and a Head who is allowed to get on and enforce the same and teach without interference?Surprise surprise it’s C! It’s not the building who teaches; it’s the teacher; it’s not the comfy chair that learns; it’s the student. You can learn just as well in a Portakabin using a tea chest as a desk if you want to and the teachers are allowed to teach without being threatened with charges for assault if they try to stop ickle Wayne from slashing naughty Callum with a machete!
Waste upon waste! The public purse lies bleedings like a dying Montague slashed across the belly by a Council of Capulets!
Phew! Got a bit poetic there!
Gildas the Monk-
9
September 20, 2010 at 09:35
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10
September 19, 2010 at 16:18 -
Well you see there is a danger of the populus getting too savvy and catching on to what the politicians are up to.
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11
September 19, 2010 at 16:19 -
Words fail me, especially the poetic ones …
I wish all in the UK courage and strength. -
12
September 19, 2010 at 16:26 -
Isn’t Norwich also the home of the other great scam – AGW?
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13
September 19, 2010 at 18:47 -
Yup. And they also threatened to chop down an avenue of Chestnut trees to deter kids from stepping into the road to pick up fallen conkers.
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14
September 20, 2010 at 08:31 -
And while they’re chucking money at the younger generation, their treatment of the elderly has left something to be desired…
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15
September 19, 2010 at 16:53 -
I like the 30′ screen that anyone can use to access the internet. So a fucking huge screen that in all likelyhood only person can use at at time. Very cost effective. And aren’t all screen interactive when they are connected to a computer – which is required to access the internet. And if more than one person can use the 30′ screen, in other words it’s sectioned off into quarters or eighths or more, it will get a bit confusing try to remember which part of the screen is yours.
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16
September 19, 2010 at 16:54 -
As well as this version of eddycation being a crime against reason, what kind of living hell would this represent for a child who wanted to learn? Forced to slouch on a beanbag, surrounded by son et lumiere, how would anyone find a little mental clarity in the midst of such bedlam?
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17
September 19, 2010 at 18:55 -
“They’re going to give the lazy little bastards even more lie-ins and turn the classroom (oh, sorry that should be ‘learning spaces’) into a “well motivated child’s bedroom” by chucking out the traditional school desks and chairs and kitting them out with bean bags, round tables and sofas.”
Urge to kill…rising!
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18
September 19, 2010 at 20:22 -
We need to wall Norwich off.
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19
September 19, 2010 at 20:36 -
The only decent feature of this is the lie-in, but that shouldn’t really cost anything as the whole day could just be moved back a little by the same amount it is delayed in the morning. 24 million is a piss take.
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20
September 19, 2010 at 23:44 -
Interesting that City Academy Norwich claims to be a New Labour “City Academy”, funded directly by central government, and yet its website reveals that one of its sponsors is … you guessed it, Norfolk County Council!
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21
September 20, 2010 at 00:49 -
You should cantact SBML who thinks children should be allowed to do what they do . And so many children want to lounge around in front of some sort of screen.
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22
September 20, 2010 at 08:35 -
A friend still in teaching tells me that sometimes he is tempted to video his lesson and play it back to his class – they seem incapable of paying attention to a real live human being but their eyes automatically fix on any screen image.
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23
September 20, 2010 at 12:57 -
Err, no I’m not. I want children to be taught. Taught properly too – as evidenced by Andrew’s article which follows this one. Allowing children some time to play outside, to be themselves, to let out energy, and to get some exercise is also needed but this should not detract from the fact that children should be educated. When my nieces come round, we ensure that time in front of a screen is kept to a minimum.
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