Ko Ko Brown
As some day it will happen that an election I must call,
I’ve got a little list — I’ve got a little list
Of snivelling back-benchers who should be voted out,
And who never would be missed — who never would be missed!
There’s the pestilential nuisances who write for Labourlist —
And Hoons with flabby hands and irritating laughs —
The feckless Steven Byers who thinks he’s rather fine,
But who is widely held by all to be a waste of time.
And the hapless Hewitt who needs an analyst –
They’d none of ‘em be missed — they’d none of ‘em be missed!
Chorus.
He’s got ‘em on his list — he’s got ‘em on his list;
And they’ll none of ‘em be missed — they’ll none of ‘em be missed.
And the Harman person — I’ve got her on my list!
And the people from Unite who strike anew each day,
Then Bercow who praises, with patronising tone,
Those who sit behind me, and all parties but his own;
He never would be missed — He never would be missed!
And the bullying Ed Balls and his gay arch nemesis
The prancing Mandelson, and others of his ilk,
And Milliband the elder, who doesn’t want to oust me, but would rather like to try;
And that singular nonentity, the dour Yvette Coop-er—
I don’t think she’d be missed — I’m sure she’d not he missed!
Chorus
He’s got her on the list — he’s got her on the list;
And I don’t think she’ll be missed — I’m sure she’ll not be missed!
And that Electoral Commission, who insist I name the day,
The interfering jobsworths — I’ve got them on the list!
And all who fail to see my right to rule, and on ending it, insist—
They’d none of ‘em be missed — they’d none of ‘em be missed.
And all the troughing members of a compromising kind,
Such as — What d’ye call him — Thing’em-bob, and likewise — Never-mind,
And ‘St— ’st— ’st— and What’s-his-name, and also You-know-who —
The task of filling up the blanks I’d rather leave to you.
But it really doesn’t matter whom I put upon the list,
That’s just my friends, I haven’t started on my enemies –
The whole ungrateful blogosphere – they’re so damned hard to please!
And they’ll none of ‘em be missed — they’ll none of ‘em be missed!
Chorus
We’ll all be on his list – We’ll all be on his list,
And we never will be missed – we never will be missed.
With Thanks to David Forward for the pictures and apologies to Messrs. W. S. Gilbert & A. Sullivan.
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- March 24, 2010 at 17:55
{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
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1
March 24, 2010 at 14:20 -
You should’ve highlighted Gilbert & Sullivan near the top of the piece…. I was trying to sing that to the tune of Abba’s Super Trooper – Duh!
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2
March 24, 2010 at 14:47 -
You shouldn’t apologise, Messrs G&S would have been proud!
And anyway, what did happen to Ko Ko? Didn’t he end up with the dodgy bird at the end of it? Katisha?
Blimey, so long since I saw that at Drury Lane. Might have to take a refresher, before the Badger taxes it.
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3
March 24, 2010 at 15:03 -
You are the very model of a modern major blogger!
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4
March 24, 2010 at 15:33 -
Applause!
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5
March 24, 2010 at 20:38 -
Encore!
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6
March 26, 2010 at 14:17 -
I grew so rich that I was sent
By the people of Witney in to Parliament.
I always voted at the E.U.’s call :
I never thought of voting for U.K. at all.
I thought so little they rewarded me
By making me the ruler of the P.C.P.But the voters they rewarded he
By deserting him in favour of U.K.I.P.ΠΞ
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7
March 26, 2010 at 14:19
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