Britain on its Beam Ends?
Old salts will recognise the signs immediately â our beloved leader sending out distress signals as the Good Ship Britannia staggers and wallows over onto her beam endsâ¦..and no sign of the Captain being keel-hauled! â is it too much to ask of life that he should be hoist on his own petard and hung upside down from a flagpole? I never did much care for the cut of his jib.
A hat tip to the excellent Old Croydonian and my thanks for this picture of our proud ensign flying upside down, unnoticed by the land-lubbing politicians.
A link to a special glossary of ancient nautical terms HERE for our overseas readers!
February 7, 2009 at 01:23
-
then Iâll send you een jus aanu, suicker.
February 7, 2009 at 00:54
-
medicijn, even
February 7, 2009 at 00:54
-
Yes, I always take [even] 2 spoontjes suiker in mijn kopje thee
Good night, Gloria.
Sorry, I missed all of the fun on the other threadâ¦
February 7, 2009 at 00:47
-
Would you like a spoontje full of sugar in your kopje thee, then? I believe
it makes the medjecine go down marvellously well!
February 7, 2009 at 00:43
-
Then youâll know why we all say pod stegs and understand why wicked,
loveable Smudd teased his lovely mum and why we all speak in a Dutch accent at
home; it means sheâs still close to all our hearts. We do actually sing Dutch
folk songs at Christmas but none of us dares make Applecake these days â but
the tempex episode was so funny ..
February 7, 2009 at 00:35
-
When I was very little, we had my German grandmother living in. I can
assure you we had a very peculiar in-speak at home. It was a shock for me to
find out when going to school, that I was using many non-existing words.
Having grown up now [to use a euphemism] and working with an international
team of collaborators, I have big joy in using with them a strange mix of
mainly English, French and Dutch, resulting in such words like âspoontjeâ
February 7, 2009 at 00:30
-
for fear of repeating myself:
Pod stegs, indeed! Pod bloody stegs? Tempex? Tem bloody pex? What
February 7, 2009 at 00:29
-
Pod stegs, indeed! Pod bloody stegs? Tempex? Tem bloody pex? Whatâs the
bloominâ world cominâ to? Shoddy language skills, I say, bloominâ shoddy.
Chatelaine, I feel sorry that you have to put up with this nonsense. (mutter,
mutter, bloominâ pod stegs ⦠)
February 6, 2009 at 16:00
-
I had a feline youâd come up with something like that.
February 6, 2009 at 15:43
-
In my experience kittens speak Klingon, that is, everything they can get
their claws into.
February 6, 2009 at 15:35
-
Twiddles thumbs ⦠tries to think of doggie puns ⦠hums absent-mindedly â¦.
twiddles thumbs ⦠wonders whether to claim that her kittens speak Catalan in
response to brilliant SpaniEL â¦. decides against it ⦠grudgingly admits that
âScholl we danceâ was brilliant too â¦
February 6, 2009 at 15:05
-
And of course we wash down our pod stegs with a kopje theeâ¦
February 6, 2009 at 15:02
-
Itâs odd, then, that though Smuddy doesnât actually speak Dutch, he does
speak almost all the time in a Dutch accent! He used to tease his lovely mum
by taking the mickey out of her accent and in fact we all pepper our
conversations with things like âpod stegsâ (poached eggs) and âtempexâ
(tent-pegs).
February 5, 2009 at 23:56
-
Ch
February 5, 2009 at 23:52
-
Good night Chatelaine â¦â¦â¦.. Just catching up Kittens! What a day and a half
â¦â¦â¦. and donât even know everything yet. I see Milly has been a Half-Wit.
Was just thinking on the way home â¦â¦â¦.. I donât think itâs healthy having
all these young men and ugly women in the UK and US Governments â¦â¦â¦. Am I
wrong to think in this way?
Have I turned into my Mother?
I donât like the way the World is going â¦â¦â¦â¦ not one bit!
February 5, 2009 at 23:13
-
Haha
Good
night, dears!
February 5, 2009 at 23:04
-
Iâve beeb expecting you. Scholl we dance?
February 5, 2009 at 22:54
-
Oh. Iâve just seen I typed âbeebâ. Bugger. That isnât what I meant to
type.
February 5, 2009 at 22:52
-
Iâll tell you exactly where it has led this evening, young man; Iâve been
attempting a complicated double-twixt-clog-over-flick-flack-with-sonorous
âAltoâembroidered-notes; that means Iâve beeb sight-reading musical form at
the same time as broadly interpreting some intricate wooden-sole work, so less
of your lip under these circumstances, laddie, if you please! Iâve a nasty
sprain now and some severe grazing about the swollen ankles; if you take into
account the persistent oedema, then I think youâll agree Iâm a sorry sort,
here on the floor ⦠thank goodness those lovely Paramedics have brought their
winch. Iâll be back in my comfy chair in a matter of hours.xx
February 5, 2009 at 22:48
-
Aaaaahhhh â¦
Well, Iâll get over it. Donât worry. Will sleep on my dictionary and prints
from Google. Flip in some Wikipedia. Should do it. No problem.
Good night:-D
February 5, 2009 at 22:34
-
Who knows where it could lead to.
February 5, 2009 at 22:34
-
You just caught the tail end of it.
February 5, 2009 at 22:29
-
Damn. Iâve missed this â¦.
February 5, 2009 at 22:29
-
Sweet Dreams of Rabbits!
February 5, 2009 at 22:14
-
You are a Wag! Keep littering this thread with Dog puns and it will have to
be impounded.
February 5, 2009 at 22:24
February 5, 2009 at 22:03
-
Just paws for thought. Iâm sure you will come up with something.
February 5, 2009 at 22:08
February 5, 2009 at 21:31
-
I have an English Espana crossâ¦. it speaks SpaniEL
February 5, 2009 at 21:43
February 5, 2009 at 21:24
-
And .. my dogs speak Dutch [and French, English & Spanish]. No offense
meant
February 5, 2009 at 21:26
February 5, 2009 at 21:23
-
Oh Gloria â¦
February 5, 2009 at 21:25
February 5, 2009 at 17:17
-
However, his sister does speak some Dutch and on happier Christmases than
the one just endured, we have been known to gather round the piano after an
agreeable meal and some glasses of fizzy pop and belt out a few old Dutch folk
songs. I canât vouch for my pronunciation, but my harmonies are spot-on.
February 5, 2009 at 16:37
-
Chatelaine â Old Smuddyâs mother was Dutch. I once asked him why he hadnât
wanted to learn the language. He thought about it for a while and replied âWhy
would I need to learn Dutch? How often do I need to speak to Belgians?â
February 5, 2009 at 15:51
-
I find your reply a bit late; âtwas deep down in the threads.
So you
speak no Dutch despite a Dutch grandmother?
February 5, 2009 at 16:04
February 4, 2009 at 18:42
-
Itâs Fairy language Chatelaine. I speak Fairy!!! And a bit of English â I
can follow German and French when I am well.
February 4, 2009 at 10:19
-
Good morning.
Evelyn Waugh is not too difficult to follow, Coco
Whatâs
your first language b.t.w.?
February 4, 2009 at 10:21
February 4, 2009 at 03:40
-
Gloria! â¦â¦â¦ You do know that English is not my first language donât you?!
I wonder sometimes if we put people off daring to post to us when they see
the way we talk to each other on here â¦â¦â¦ Itâs like a whole new language â¦â¦â¦.
They must scratch their heads â¦â¦â¦â¦.
Good job Chatelaine is extra-multi-lingual â¦â¦â¦ But I think she will have
learned another one if she stays with us! â Especially after our Troll episode
the other night!
And â¦â¦â¦. my family â¦â¦â¦.. they errrr â¦â¦. never mentioned the War â¦â¦â¦.
February 4, 2009 at 01:00
-
And with that, I wish you all a good Evelyn.
February 4, 2009 at 00:50
-
A very good friend of mine told me that his late father was of the opinion
that what this country needed was another war. Only it turned out he meant
another Waugh. Make of that what you will.
February 3, 2009 at 23:33
-
It is frightening Jo â¦â¦â¦.. I see Africa and Asia are not sent foodstuffs
and medical supplies. Western Governments protest that they donât send the
supplies because the militants sequester them â¦â¦â¦â¦. But you and I know the
truth!
There is a major plan to reduce the number of people in countries that
cannot sustain themselves â¦â¦â¦â¦â¦â¦ but no Government will admit it.
The druggy companies are at the helm of this destruction of humankind and
nobody will tell me any different until they nationalise the whole filthy
industry.
Maybe we will get head-ache tablets and vaccines for a couple of quid
instead of the extornionate amounts we actually have to pay â¦â¦â¦
When patents run out â¦â¦â¦ they are always renewed â¦â¦â¦.. just under a
different name.
But I seriously believe that Wars are encouraged to wipe out the
populations of certain areas.
February 3, 2009 at 22:59
-
Noâ¦its all about THE crisis and me I am on the verge of a nervous breakdown
with all their lies,the global LIES
There
is a very good one,surely you know it? âhasta que se sepa la verdadâ.(I was
not talking about that one thoâ!)
Gone for a munch and an early night.I am
dead meat.
See you tomorrow
February 3, 2009 at 22:49
-
Anything errrrrr â¦â¦â¦. interesting at all? Anything that we should pop in
the MM thread â¦â¦â¦..? I canât read Spanish â¦â¦â¦â¦ or Portuguese â¦â¦â¦..
February 3, 2009 at 22:22
-
jajajajajaja I was on a spanish stooopid blog.What a non-level theyâve
got,honestly
February 3, 2009 at 22:15
-
Oh Jo! How I have missed you.
February 3, 2009 at 21:57
-
REVOLUTION NOW !!!
Thats what we need in the UkK and all over our
bleeding planet
Hang
onâ¦Iâll put my âmorgan coatâ on
I will be off in 3 freaking days now.Just
on a course : how to kill bugs in poor countries and dig up hole to make wells
⦠as if they didnt know how to find it themselvesâ¦errâ¦ooops!
Hey! by the
way,what did he do again,Mr.Bordon Grown? He is looking fatter by the dayâ¦yuk
the man yukyukyukyuk
February 3, 2009 at 21:32
-
Time for mutiny then!
Gordieâs beam wants kicking! We need a massive a re-shuffle of all the
Half-Wits he has in the Cabinet â¦â¦â¦. And yes that includes Mandy, Milly and
that dreadful Jacqui Smith.
He needs to take a leaflet out of Obamaâs book as from today and get the
experts and academics to run the country.
This is not a Labour Government!
Gordie has given us a taste of Fascism that even Hitler balked at!
Bugger off Gordie â¦â¦â¦â¦â¦ and take that Sour-Puss of a wife with you!
I have nightmares about her ending up in some Governmental role.
I am shuddering even thinking about the shower of sh*te that are running
the country. No wonder the rest of the World hates us.
February 3, 2009 at 20:12
-
These people seem to have a flare for this sort of thing.
February 3, 2009 at 18:07
-
Sounds like someoneâs in line for a good clipper round the ear.
February 3, 2009 at 14:47
-
âTo stand and be still
to the Birkenâead Drill
is a damn tough bullet
to chew â
R. Kipling.
{ 54 comments }